Boss giving me grief.....help!!!!!

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Sammywu1
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Posted: Fri Mar 28, 2008 9:58 pm 
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Hello,
I just wanted to let you know that I went through a similar thing with my 1st pregnancy. I discovered I was suffering from Low Blood Pressure and as a result was fainting about 3 times a day when I was really worn out or really hot ect. Just before I fainted I usually managed to get my self out of the public eye and down on the floor where I would lay passed out for a few minutes untill I felt better. One day one of my managers had a right go at me telling me she "couldn't be dealing with all this [*CENSORED*]" and that I was too much trouble than I was worth. I explained that with my condition I should be given minimal duties and not expected to stand up for my full 8 hour shift. She wouldn't listen to a thing and although I was really worried I wrote it all down and contacted my head office. It was all people I had never met before and I delt with them all over the phone. Simply telling them all that is going on and them asking your cow of a manager maybe enough to make her back off. If not they can always send you on Maternity leave early and still pay full pay. That is what my company ended up doing. Employers really have to be careful with how pregnant people are treated in the work place. Be brave, you have done nothing wrong and nothing to be ashamed of. xxx
Chutzpah
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Posted: Sat Mar 29, 2008 3:19 pm 
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At the end of the day, rights are in place but it's up to you to use them. The reason that people abuse them is because they think they can get away with it. Unfortunately, by keeping quiet you will allow her to do it to others. Don't forget, this is no different to playground bullying!

If she gets told off she may sulk but any backlash will only look worse on her and in her heart she will know that.

HR will be much better trained in your rights and will also quick to act. Big companies are petrified of being sued and they WILL do something.
CHELLE9
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Posted: Sat Mar 29, 2008 5:48 pm 
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hi cjarchibald

Sorry to hear about you suffering because of your boss. i use to work for one just like her. and congrats on your pregnancy as i am 20 weeks now.

Where do i start with this one but correctly you need to keep a diary of all incidents/behaviours that is happening to you from your bosses attitude (i work in the HR dept for tesco) and also approach your area Manager - her boss and tell him in a professional way what is happening and also show him the diary if needs be. Are any other members of staff witnesses this behaviour? Also get advice from ACAS the contact tel no is 0845 7474747 and they deal with cases and give very useful information on how to cope, what law that your boss has to obide by and also what law is to protect you as an prenant employee. You are allowed to self certify sick for the first five days before a doctors note has to be issued. You could try and approach your boss, tell her what she is exactly doing to you and how unprofessional her behaviour is without having to get into a disagreement and you are also entitled to have a witness there too. this is usually the first step before a grievance is placed.

Hope you succeed with it but its worth dealing as she will do it to other people, but do get professional help and advice for it. Why should you go on maternity leave early cause your boss has personal issue. it should be the other way around. hope the info helps.
Archie1
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Posted: Sat Mar 29, 2008 9:29 pm 
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I totally understand and agree with the advice from you guys and very much appreciate it. As it's gone on so long now it feels so alien to actually go ahead and do something about it !! I feel too that because it's in a store where I work extremely closely with this woman, it is just going to be so uncomfortable if she gets a talking to from her boss and HR for doing this to me (and the others too). I suppose I just have to weigh up what's going to be tougher - her in a raging mood all the time being abusive or her being sulky and not speaking to me!!! Without the hormones going crazy I would be able to deal with the repercussions a lot better but unfortunately since i'm feeling so much more vulnerable just now, it's a daunting thought. I agree she is bullying so I just have to be brave and grow some balls to deal with her.....very scared though!!!!! Chutzpah I think it's always worse with women as some seem to enjoy upsetting other women and I think you're right about the jealousy aspect xxx
CHELLE9
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Posted: Sun Mar 30, 2008 12:42 pm 
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hi CJ

I get what you are kinda are saying but is it goin to hurt by get advice from ACAS which is free and you don't neccessarily have to act on it. but having that knowledge will make you stronger when dealing with her to be honest. i was in your position back last year but i wasn't pregnant then. i spoke to ACAS they gave me advice and boy did it do me a world of good. i put up with her for five years and i just uped ad walked out (this is not everyones cup of tea with this type of action and i aint saying you should do this) but i am in a job with more pay, les hours and its so easy to do. wish i had done it sooner and they are really supportive with my pregnancy otherwise i would have been in the same boat if i had stayed in my last job.

and the end of the day you have to do what is best for you and the baby in the less stressful way. so good luck (you could always get a punch bag and pretend her face is on it - gets rid of tension for you at least as long as you do it gently lol)
smelen
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Posted: Sun Mar 30, 2008 7:22 pm 
Post subject: Outrageous
I'm not going to rant and rave and waste my breath on this stupid woman of a boss (?!) but if I were you, I would go and get signed off. Nothing is more important than you and the baby.

I really hope it works out for you. noone should have 2 go through that, it's disgusting and twisted behaviour of ur boss (if we can even call her that)!!

Helen
jenniP35
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Posted: Tue Apr 01, 2008 8:40 am 
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HI, DON'T WANT TO REPEAT ANY ADVICE THAT OTHERS HAVE GIVEN YOU BUT JUST WONDERED IF ITS A LARGE COMPANY ARE YOU WITH A UNION AND DO YOU HAVE AN OCCUPATIONAL HEALTH SERVICE. IF SO IT MIGHT BE WORTH HAVE A CASUAL CHAT WITH THEM AND SEEING WHAT SORT OF SUPPORT IF ANY THEY CAN OFFER YOU.

I'M GUESSING YOU WORK IN RETAIL - ARE YOU OFFICE BASED OR SHOP FLOOR OR CAN YOU NOT SAY.

THIS WOMAN SOUNDS LIKE A TOTAL [*CENSORED*], WISH I WORKED WITH YOU, I'D BLOODY WELL SORT HER OUT Evil or Very Mad
Archie1
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Posted: Wed Apr 02, 2008 4:01 pm 
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Just wanted to let you guys know that b*tchface tried to give me a hardtime about something on Monday morning for something that happened on Saturday (I was off Fri pm, Sat and Sun!!!!Very Happy) and I gave her as good as I got and asked what her real problem with me was. She was speechless. She was back instore today after an area meeting yesterday and was buying me cakes and sucking right up my butt........i'm not convinced she won't go bad again but for once I came home not feeling like sh*t!!!!
I am still keeping my notebook and plan to contact HR before I leave for mat leave ....5 weeks nows hoorah!.....even if it's just to advise them of her attitude so at least they will have a complaint against her if she starts giving the other staff grief when I leave.
Much love to you all and your bumps!,
xxxxxx
sozzle
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Posted: Wed Apr 02, 2008 5:04 pm 
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well done you!!! Bullies are all the same arent they, cowards when you confront them even grown ups! Think you are doing all the right things and definitely worth mentioning it to HR before you leave - i hope the final weeks at work are now better.sozzle
CHELLE9
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Posted: Wed Apr 02, 2008 5:40 pm 
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good news CJ stand up to the stupid a**e. glad you are feeling well though as definately mention it to HR cause you have to go back once maternity leave over so better to deal with it now than later. everyone has their breaking point and i think everyones advices has helped you. But enjoy the remainder of weeks now.

I am every so pleased for you. say hi to bump lol.
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