Posted: Fri Jan 23, 2009 12:40 pm Post subject: Laws of nature........funny
In Lebanon, men are legally allowed to have sex with animals, but the animals must be female. Having sexual relations with a male animal is punishable by death.
( Like THAT makes sense..)
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In Bahrain, a male doctor may legally examine a woman's genitals, but is prohibited from looking directly at them during the examination. He may only see their reflection in a mirror.
( Do they look different reversed?)
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Muslims are banned from looking at the genitals of a corpse. This also applies to undertakers. The sex organs of the deceased must be covered with a brick or piece of wood at all times.
(A brick?)
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The penalty for masturbation in Indonesia i s decapitation.
(Much worse than 'going blind'!)
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There are men in Guam whose full-time job is to travel the countryside and deflower young virgins, who pay them for the privilege of having sex for the first time. Reason: under Guam law, it is expressly forbidden for virgins to marry.
(Let's just think for a minute; is there any job anywhere else in the world that even comes close to this?)
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In Hong Kong, a betrayed wife is legally allowed to kill her adulterous husband, but may only do so with her bare hands. The husband's illicit lover, on the other hand, may be killed in any manner desired.
(Ah! Justice!)
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Topless saleswomen are legal in Liverpool, England - but only in tropical fish stores.
(But of course!)
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In Cali, Colombia, a woman may only have sex with her husband, and the first time this happens, her mother must be in the room to witness the act.
(Makes one shudder at the thought.)
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In Santa Cruz, Bolivia, it is illegal for a man to have sex with a woman and her daughter at the same time.
(I presume this was a big enough problem that they had to pass this law?)
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In Maryland, it is illegal to sell condoms from vending machines with one exception: Prophylactics may be dispensed from a vending machine only 'in places where alcoholic beverages are sold for consumption on the premises.'
(Is this a great country or what? Well, not as great as Guam !)
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Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories an hour.
(Who volunteers for this stuff?)
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Humans and dolphins are the only species that have sex for pleasure.
(Is that why Flipper was always smiling?)
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The ant can lift 50 times its own weight, can pull 30 times its own weight and always falls over on its right side when intoxicated.
( From drinking little bottles of???)
( Did the government pay for this research??)
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Butterflies taste with their feet.
(Ah, geez.)
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An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.
(I know some people like that.)
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Starfish don't have brains.
( I know some people like that, too.)
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And, the best for last?
Turtles can breathe through their butts.
(And I thought I had bad breath in the morning!) _________________
Leitia
AskBaby Star
Joined: 13 Nov 2007
Posts: 2697
Posted: Fri Jan 23, 2009 12:47 pm Post subject:
haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!! they are awesome, had me chuckling away so much my belly now hurts
AliciasMummy2009
Guru Member
Joined: 26 Jul 2008
Posts: 1391
Posted: Fri Jan 23, 2009 12:48 pm Post subject:
my brother has just emailed me loads of them and i'm sitting here with belly ache too..........from laughing he he
xx _________________
jamieleigh
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Joined: 04 Oct 2008
Posts: 4958
Posted: Fri Jan 23, 2009 1:16 pm Post subject:
lmao of hun these r blumin great where does your brother get them lol x
AliciasMummy2009
Guru Member
Joined: 26 Jul 2008
Posts: 1391
Posted: Fri Jan 23, 2009 1:17 pm Post subject:
jamieleigh wrote:
lmao of hun these r blumin great where does your brother get them lol x
I have no idea. He never normally sends them to me.
He's a accountant and I've always thought he was professional until today he he
Now I know he just looks at jokes all day
xx _________________
emmie02
Guru Member
Joined: 01 Jan 2010
Posts: 1242
Posted: Fri Jun 17, 2011 7:53 pm Post subject:
These r brilliant!!!
Gonna have to pinch a few of them. _________________
KaBum
AskBaby Star
Joined: 02 Oct 2010
Posts: 4473
Posted: Sat Jun 18, 2011 11:53 am Post subject:
MingoMayo
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Joined: 05 Jun 2011
Posts: 2049
Posted: Sun Jun 26, 2011 8:33 pm Post subject:
loved these!!! am definitely curious about the liverpool one?! How will that help to sell fish?! _________________