Second due date

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dohdoh1984
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Posted: Sat Dec 17, 2011 10:34 pm 
Post subject: Second due date
My second baby was due today Crying or Very sad myself and OH went to light a chinese lantern, like we did with the first due date. I am so gutted, as it took ages to light, and when it did it didn't 'fly' Crying or Very sad So, I decided to light a candle at home. Part of me doesn't feel it's the same, I feel like I've let the little one down for not doing what we did with the first one Crying or Very sad Sad
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Komolafe
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Posted: Sun Dec 18, 2011 1:13 am 
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So sorry it didnt go to plan, but the most important thing is you took the time out to remember your precious little angel, who will have been watching you and knows what was on your mind.

I felt the same when I arranged Samuel's funeral. I had more time to make arrangements for him, compared to when we had Olivia's funeral which was 3 weeks earlier, so I was able to do some extra little things and still feel so guilty for not giving the same to Olivia Sad We feel so much guilt for something that is not our fault and although you could probably give me advice and tell me I shouldnt feel this guilt, we cannot quite believe the same and take note of our advice can we Confused I am desperately trying to find a little piece of jewellery online now, which I could maybe have engraved with their names/dates of birth. I know I will never forget them but I just want a visible reminder too. Maybe a little token item might help you? Don't be too hard on yourself hun. Hope you feel a little brighter tomorrow xxx
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dohdoh1984
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Posted: Sun Dec 18, 2011 4:09 pm 
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It is so true that we cannot take our own advice. I shouldn't really complain, as you've been through so much more heartache with your 2 little angels Sad
I did buy a miscarriage bracelet, and my OH thought it was creepy Sad so I've never worn it, so I've kept it in it's pouch. So, in September when it was coming up to the first due date, I got a tattoo on my wrist, which my OH designed. I was one of these people that'd never have a tattoo done, but I thought this was a way of keeping my 2 little angels with me forever.
I hope that you find the right piece of jewellery, you'll know it's right one when you see it. Smile xx
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Angelcake71
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Posted: Sun Dec 18, 2011 8:29 pm 
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Sad so sorry hun..

my 2nd due date is in January so I know how you feel.. dont feel guilty hun.. ok..

((HUGS)) XXX
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Tubal Reversal 19/7/10
Angel Baby due 18/5/2011 (ectopic)
Angel Baby due 25/1/2012 (m/c)
Angel Baby due 21/6/2012 (m/c)
All 3 much loved and wanted xx
dohdoh1984
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Posted: Sun Dec 18, 2011 9:01 pm 
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It's just [*@!#%*] that we're having to watch these due dates go by, so unfair xx
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Komolafe
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Posted: Mon Dec 19, 2011 12:28 am 
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dohdoh1984 wrote:
It is so true that we cannot take our own advice. I shouldn't really complain, as you've been through so much more heartache with your 2 little angels Sad
I did buy a miscarriage bracelet, and my OH thought it was creepy Sad so I've never worn it, so I've kept it in it's pouch. So, in September when it was coming up to the first due date, I got a tattoo on my wrist, which my OH designed. I was one of these people that'd never have a tattoo done, but I thought this was a way of keeping my 2 little angels with me forever.
I hope that you find the right piece of jewellery, you'll know it's right one when you see it. Smile xx


Dohdoh hun, Ive realised that DH and I are grieving in such different ways so I can understand you not wanting to wear the bracelet once you realised your OH thought it wasnt right ( I personally agree with you and have the same feeling that I just HAVE to have a permanent reminder) Glad you got the tattoo. Part of me is also wanting to do that and I did make some make some enquiries about that last night. Im just going to take a little time to think about it and if I dont find the right type of keepsake then I will probably buy myself that tattoo in January as a birthday present.

I get comfort from believing all of our angels are playing together and looking after each other....just as their mums do down here. I really couldnt have got through these last few months without the support of the girls on here, especially the mums of those precious angels including you Angelcake xxx
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Angelcake71
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Posted: Mon Dec 19, 2011 12:29 pm 
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Glad to see you posting Komolafe.. and I want to say that I have been amazed by your courage in dealing with the sad loss of Samuel and Olivia.. you are one brave strong lady.. even though you may not feel that you are at times.. I hope that it helps you in some way just by posting on here.. my OH bought me a ring of the babies birthstone.. for each one that I lost.. so I have an emerald one for the one that was due in May an amethyst one for the baby due in January 2012 .. and am getting a Ruby one.. for the baby that was due in June 2012.. it gives me comfort wearing them.. and I think a tattoo is a lovely idea too.. and something that I am thinking of doing as well..

Take care both of you.. lots of love and hugs XX
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Tubal Reversal 19/7/10
Angel Baby due 18/5/2011 (ectopic)
Angel Baby due 25/1/2012 (m/c)
Angel Baby due 21/6/2012 (m/c)
All 3 much loved and wanted xx
dohdoh1984
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Posted: Mon Dec 19, 2011 4:17 pm 
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Komolafe if you don't find the perfect piece of jewellery, you will find the nicest tattoo, and you'll know it's right for your 2 angels. Mine is 2 small 3d stars, on my wrist which I was perfect. The ladies on here are brilliant at being there for you, and I was amazed at how much support you got through your losses! It's really a comfort to know, that all the ladies on here care and take the time to support everyone in their time of need Smile
Angelcake I never even thought about the birthstones! I will look into this after Christmas, due to my first being September and the second December, I could maybe get them on a necklace...
Take care ladies! Big hugs xxx
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Angelcake71
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Posted: Mon Dec 19, 2011 4:26 pm 
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Smile sounds lovely Dohdoh.... a necklace sounds great!! XX
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Tubal Reversal 19/7/10
Angel Baby due 18/5/2011 (ectopic)
Angel Baby due 25/1/2012 (m/c)
Angel Baby due 21/6/2012 (m/c)
All 3 much loved and wanted xx
LianneJane5687
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Posted: Tue Dec 20, 2011 5:12 pm 
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Sorry to hear that hun, i know it's hard, my first baby was due on 17th May this year and it was very hard, the only thing that kept me going was knowing i had another baby growing inside me that needed her mummy to keep strong and that if i had the first one i wouldn't have been blessed with Amelia-Rose.

I love all these keepsake ideas
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LianneJane5687
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Posted: Tue Dec 20, 2011 5:16 pm 
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Also i forgot to mention that we always refer to our first baby as Angel for obvious reasons so chose to have Angel as Amelia-Rose' middle name Smile
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dohdoh1984
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Posted: Tue Dec 20, 2011 6:19 pm 
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Awww that's a lovely name! Now we've got through the second due date, I'm kind of feeling more at ease, if this makes sense. Like I can start to move on, although obviously there won't be a day that goes by that I won't think about them, but that I can start to move on... xx
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