What to do?

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Squibby06
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Posted: Fri Mar 13, 2009 4:43 pm 
Post subject: What to do?
Well I am in a right pickle!lol

I didn't get told to make and appointment for my 6 week check,so I thought they would send it to me and as it can be between 6-8 weeks,I waited,but nothing came.

Then Alfie had his 8 week check last week and the doc asked me if I'd had mine,I was so embarrassed and told him I hadnt but he didnt seem worried and didnt tell me to make an appointment.

But now I want to make one but not sure if it's too late?and are they gonna be mad with me for not going sooner? Embarassed I really need to go but dont want to look stupid.

I need to go docs for another thing too but I can't do it all,they'll think I'm weird!lol.so I'm not sure which to go for.

can i leave the check for a while longer and go for the other thing,or should i do that now?my head is such a mess at the mo,I can't even think straight.help please!
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Cuddlefish
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Posted: Fri Mar 13, 2009 8:21 pm 
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Don't worry about 'looking weird' - make the appointment. My brother is a doctor (who is specialising in Paediatrics - hooray!! I have my own personal baby doctor in the family!!) and when I was fretting about the HV coming to visit me (half my house is basically a building site - to cut a long story short, the house renovations I had hoped would be finished before Lucy was born, err, weren't... ahh, the joys of family members doing your building work for you on the cheap!), and he simply said 'you've got to remember that no matter what you think, they've seen worse'. So although you're worried about making a late appointment, there will be women who just don't bother at all... just explain you've been busy (blame the baby brain - I do it all the time! Hehee!) and I'm sure you'll be fine Very Happy
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Squibby06
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Posted: Fri Mar 13, 2009 9:26 pm 
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Thanks hun Very Happy .

I think I will try and go on monday if I can.I think the other reason I have put it off is because I know they are going to ask me things I don't want to have to talk about, i.e. how I'm feeling,so I'm still reluctant to go,which is stupid I know but it's hard.

Thing is,I'm the kind of person who pretends things are ok when they're not,so I can see me saying I'm fine,when I don't really feel it,but I do need to go,can't put it off forever.

thanks again hun x
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DevonMum
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Posted: Sat Mar 14, 2009 7:02 am 
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hey squib

its hard to talk about these things - everyone here with a touch of pnd has agonised for weeks before getting he courage. go along for your check and get the physicals sorted out - and if you feel ready, raise the issue of your feelings. As cuddle says, ALL docs have seen far far worse than you hun, I promise you. No one will be judgemental or hard on you, what you are going through is totally normal and expected, so please please don't feel bad about feeling bad!!

If you don't feel ready to talk yet - don't!! you'll get the most out of it when you're really ready for that discussion.

Keep smiling, take a deep breath, and book the appointment Very Happy

Good luck hun

Anna
xx
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Cuddlefish
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Posted: Sat Mar 14, 2009 7:03 pm 
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*hugs* I know it's hard (I had clinical depression a few years ago) and you're worried you're going to be judged, but honestly - please try not to. Doctors nowadays are (on the whole) very sensitive towards depression of any type, and pnd is one of the most recognised (my heath authority actually hands out questionnaires to assess how a mother is feeling as standard now) - they'd rather know how you are feeling and try to help you than for you to bottle it all up - pnd is absolutely no reflection upon you as a mother! As DevonMum says, don't feel you have to bring up anything you're finding hard, but at the same time, don't feel pressurised into making out everything is okay and struggle along by yourself Smile

Take care, please try not to be too hard on yourself (I know - easier said than done...) and big hugs to you and your LO!
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Squibby06
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Posted: Sun Mar 15, 2009 9:42 pm 
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Thank you both so much for your advice,it really does help being able to talk about it on here,it's just I find talking in person so hard to do,it's not something I'm good at,so think that's why I've been putting off going as well but I know I do need to go.

thank you both again xx
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DevonMum
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Posted: Mon Mar 16, 2009 11:55 am 
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hey squib

a while ago someone gave advice to eitehr write it all down before you go, or print out your thread from on here, and just hand it all over to the doc. I think that's worked for a fwe ladies who really couldn't actually start talking about it all. Can't remember who said it, but was def good advice - might work for you too!!

good luck hun

Anna
xx
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Squibby06
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Posted: Mon Mar 16, 2009 8:41 pm 
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Thanks hun,I might do that.See if I can find me old post maybe,if not,I've written my OH a letter,so maybe I will take that.

hoping to go sometime this week.wanted to go tomorrow but couldnt get an appointment.xx
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