Life Lessons - To Lighten Your Day he he

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AliciasMummy2009
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Posted: Fri Jan 23, 2009 12:46 pm 
Post subject: Life Lessons - To Lighten Your Day he he
GREAT TRUTHS THAT LITTLE CHILDREN HAVE LEARNED:

1) No matter how hard you try, you can't baptise cats.
2) When your Mum is mad at your Dad, don't let her brush your hair.
3) If your sister hits you, don't hit her back. They always catch the second person.
4) Never ask your 3-year old brother to hold a tomato.
5) You can't trust dogs to watch your food.
6) Don't sneeze when someone is cutting your hair.
7) Never hold a Dust-Buster and a cat at the same time.
Cool You can't hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk.
9) Don't wear polka-dot underwear under white shorts.
10) The best place to be when you're sad is Grandpa's lap.

GREAT TRUTHS THAT ADULTS HAVE LEARNED:

1) Raising teenagers is like nailing jelly to a tree.
2) Wrinkles don't hurt.
3) Families are like fudge...mostly sweet, with a few nuts.
4) Today's mighty oak is just yesterday's nut that held its ground.?
5) Laughing is good exercise. It's like jogging on the inside.
6) Middle age is when you choose your cereal for the fibre, not the toy.

GREAT TRUTHS ABOUT GROWING OLD

1) Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional.
2) Forget the health food. I need all the preservatives I can get.
3) When you fall down, you wonder what else you can do while you're down there.
4) You're getting old when you get the same sensation from a rocking chair that you. once got from a roller coaster.
5) It's frustrating when you know all the answers but nobody bothers to ask you the questions.
6) Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician.
7) Wisdom comes with age, but sometimes age comes alone.

THE FOUR STAGES OF LIFE:

1) You believe in Santa Claus.
2) You don't believe in Santa Claus.
3) You are Santa Claus.
4) You look like Santa Claus.

SUCCESS:

At age 4 success is . . . not piddling in your pants.
At age 12 success is . . . having friends.
At age 17 success is . . having a drivers licence.
At age 35 success is having money.
At age 70 success is . . . having a drivers licence.
At age 75 success is . . . having friends.
At age 80 success is . . . not piddling in your pants.
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Leitia
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Posted: Fri Jan 23, 2009 12:51 pm 
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HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!! oh god i actually wee'd a little laughing at those Embarassed Hilarious Laughing Laughing
jamieleigh
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Posted: Fri Jan 23, 2009 12:52 pm 
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Laughing Laughing Laughing Laughing Laughing Laughing Laughing very funny hun they made my day xx
ClairaBell
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Posted: Fri Jan 23, 2009 12:56 pm 
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lol. These are great. xxxx
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AliciasMummy2009
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Posted: Fri Jan 23, 2009 12:57 pm 
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Leitia wrote:
HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!! oh god i actually wee'd a little laughing at those Embarassed Hilarious Laughing Laughing


I nearlly weed laughing at the thought that you did pee a little

xx
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Leitia
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Posted: Fri Jan 23, 2009 1:00 pm 
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Mummy2be2009 wrote:
Leitia wrote:
HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!! oh god i actually wee'd a little laughing at those Embarassed Hilarious Laughing Laughing


I nearlly weed laughing at the thought that you did pee a little

xx


we could get into a vicious circle here but...the thought of you nearly doing that cos i did nearly made me do it again... Shocked im off to get some tena lady especially if you have more of these posts Wink
AliciasMummy2009
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Posted: Fri Jan 23, 2009 1:02 pm 
Post subject:
Leitia wrote:
Mummy2be2009 wrote:
Leitia wrote:
HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!! oh god i actually wee'd a little laughing at those Embarassed Hilarious Laughing Laughing


I nearlly weed laughing at the thought that you did pee a little

xx


we could get into a vicious circle here but...the thought of you nearly doing that cos i did nearly made me do it again... Shocked im off to get some tena lady especially if you have more of these posts Wink


Yeah get the tena lady on, I'm not done yet Laughing Laughing Laughing Laughing Laughing

xxx
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Freesha
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Posted: Fri May 08, 2009 12:00 pm 
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haha thats hilarious
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