Posted: Wed Mar 05, 2008 1:20 pm
Post subject: When to tell people????!!????
I am only about 6/7 weeks pregnant and am scared to tell people because of all the old myths!!!
I have told our parents and had to tell people at my stables (as i have decided to stop riding my thoroughbred just in case!) but that is it.
I want the world to know that we are expecting, but being so early i am worried that so many things can go wrong and that by telling people i am bringing bad luck into it all!!! I so want this little one to be ok but keep worrying about all the things that can go wrong....especially as my midwife wont even see me for another two weeks!
Would love to hear everyone elses thoughts on this!
Posted: Wed Mar 05, 2008 3:11 pm
Hi there - congratulations!!
i totally understand your concerns. I wanted to wait until 12 weeks when as you probably know the chance of miscarrying reduces significantly but i ended up having to tell people at work and then my parents at 11 weeks as i was due to go on a gruelling work trip that i didnt feel up to. That was last weekend and am now paranoid that ive "jinxed" things!!! I think there is no right or wrong time to tell people. its completely personal to you. My main concern was and still is "what happens if i miscarry" but logically i know this is silly as I know people who have miscarried in the early stages of pregnancy but also in the latter stages as well when you would imagine everything to be fine. That said, there is a much higher chance of miscarriage in the first trimester so some people do prefer to wait (me included!) until the 12 week milestone. However, i do think its all rather beyond our control i dont think telling people will do anything to harm the baby!! i hope it all goes well
Posted: Wed Mar 05, 2008 3:35 pm
Common sense stops working when you are pregnant though doesn't it! You start worrying about the slightest little thing! I have not even seen my midwife yet and have been given no advice at all - not really how you imagine it! Every little ache is worrying!!!
Posted: Thu Mar 06, 2008 9:49 am
I totally agree!! I worry about absolutely everything - twinges, aches etc. then i worry when i dont feel anything!! My husband keeps telling me to save worries for when baby is older and can really give us something to worry about LOL! I was also quite surprised about the lack of information and contact with midwife/doctor. Im quite lucky in that ive got a really nice female doctor who is herself pregnant and so was very sympathetic and booked me a dating scan for 7 and half weeks. i think i would have gone crazy waiting until 12 weeks. i would go and see your GP to talk about things if you think its helpful (dont worry about time wasting, you wont be) Also, one word of advice, when you have your booking appointment with your midwife, take notes!! There is SO much information thrown at you in a short space of time you can feel a bit overwhelmed and a little confused. I know i did!
Posted: Thu Mar 06, 2008 9:53 am
Thanks for the advice, will buy myself a nice new notebook for all things baby!!!
Good to hear i am not the only one that feels like this - sometimes you feel that you are losing the plot, especially when it's too early to tell people and talk to them about it all!
Posted: Thu Mar 06, 2008 10:05 am
totally! its a really confusing time and, as you say, since you cant talk to anyone about it, you arent sure whether what you are experiencing is "normal" or something you need to worry about. I have to say, thats why ive found this website really good. its such a relief when find out that, yes, the light spotting, cramps etc are totally normal! Im also glad that i can now talk to my mum about it as she is very good at reassuring me. My husband tries really hard but just looks like a bunny trapped in headlights half the time!!
Posted: Thu Mar 06, 2008 10:31 am
I can't wait to tell people any sort of news, whether it's because I found a chocolate bar unwrapped or because I'm having a baby. My hubby and I found out at about 5 weeks, and the next day, the announcement was up on Facebook and we were on our way to the grandparent's to tell them.
I'm now at 24 weeks and the little baby is still going strong (I'm even telling everyone what I'm naming him already).
Posted: Fri Mar 07, 2008 4:02 pm
although the worry always stuck in my mind.. and aches a pains always caused me to worry a little more. We told people as soon as we found out when I was about 4/5 weeks pregnant. Completely normal to worry! I didnt tell anyone at work until after the 12 week scan tho!
Im now 20 weeks and sooo happy! everything is fantastic and cant wait for my next scan. 28th march!
Posted: Fri Mar 07, 2008 6:06 pm
i cant hold my water for anything!!!
i really wanted to wait till i was 3months before telling anyone, and i only made it to 5 weeks and everybody knew!!!
i cant keep a secret for long! lol!
im 11 weeks now so nearly at the 3 month mark! cant wait for my scan in 2 weeks time!!!! yey!!!
thing we all get paranoid somethings wrong untill we can see for ourselves!