Posted: Mon Mar 10, 2008 12:03 pm
Post subject: so confused?
I have been with my partner for 4 years and found out i was pregnant 4 months ago our relationship wasnt that grate befor as we argued a lot and have never been that big on talking i thought maybe this wouid change things and he wouid grow up a bit but he just seems to have got worse he always tells me he loves me but we have stopt having sex and all i can keep thinking is that hes cheeting on me i have confronted him about this and he swears he isnt he dosent seem intrested at all not with me or the baby he dosent want to no about anything that is happening i try to get him involved iv brought books and marked pages that might intrest him but nothing he just ignors it with all the hormones running aroung i dont no wether im coming or going and get upset a lot then i think maybe its me just being silly i just dont no what to say or do my family lives so far away and i havent spoken to my mum in 5 years and only have one mate that lives near but he just dosent understand it HELP.
Posted: Mon Mar 10, 2008 12:24 pm
Hi chick, i know how you are feeling. Me and my partner have always argued quite a lot, and when i got pregnant i hoped it would get better. The problem is, is that there is so much pressure on you both (and particularly you because of your hormones), that it can become worse. We also had to basically redecorate the entire house, which has been mega stressful!!! Me and my fella have had our ups and downs during the pregnancy, ive threatened to leave, and we've talked about splitting up. He was the same with books, i bought him a book aimed at dads and he wasnt interested, whenever ive been shopping for baby stuff, i've done it alone. However, our baby is due this wednesday, and the last couple of weeks he has been fantastic, he's supported me when ive felt weepy an emotional (quite a lot!!). However, he is still not interested in books, or when the baby kicks and stuff - i think its hard for them to get excited about the baby kicking as they cant feel it like we can!!
In terms of the sex, we havent had sex for about 4 months - he has no interest, and its not because he's cheating, but because he says he cant do it knowing that the baby is in there - maybe you should ask your partner if this is the reason??
try to keep calm and think that some men are just very 'manly' do you know what i mean, and he will absolutely adore that little one when its born, its just hard for some blokes to get excited about something that they cant see! Good luck, and keep me posted on how you're getting on xx
Posted: Mon Mar 10, 2008 12:25 pm
Hi there, im sorry to hear about your situation and that your so unhappy. Try sitting down and talking to him, make him listen and really open up about how you feel. Hopefully he will open up abit too.
You could also try talking to your midwife, i think it helps to let all of your worries and concerns out.
Maybe think about doing some type of classes, for example, yoga.. its great exercise for the baby and a great place to make some more friends. Also chatting and making friends on here helps, so keep coming back and talking to us all.
Hope you work things out xx