Posted: Tue Jan 04, 2011 9:42 am
Post subject: Would love some advice please
I was hoping to get some advice on adoption as its something me and the oh have discussed looking into for this year.
We've been tryin for our own baby 4 years now and after tests have learnt that we are in the unexplained infertility category and that our chances of concieving are 1% with ivf as our only option.
Due to severe phobias i have been advised from my counsellor that i probably wouldn't manage emotionally and mentally with the procedure and that im pushing myself so far im going to have a breakdown and im afraid she's right!!
Our only option apart from keeping trying naturally, is now adoption.......... and ive no idea where to start???????
I called our local authority who told me i couldn't adopt from them as i work for the council, however im hoping to start my own business this year so that shouldn't be a problem.
Obviously we want to adopt a baby but i understand that so does everyone else and im willing to wait but does anyone know what my chances are of adopting an under 1 year old? sorry for the long post and i hope someone could help me x x x x
Posted: Fri Jan 07, 2011 9:45 am
I've never been through the adoption process but I would imagine it could also be very stressful , I was just wondering how your consultant can give you a figure of only having a 1% chance of having a baby naturally if there's nothing physically wrong with either of you and your fertility is unexplained ? Maybe i'm being a bit thick here ? (It does happen ) But if they're saying there's no reason you can't conceive then it sounds very negative to me to give you a percentage which is so low and can't do your self confidence any favours .
I have heard of a few ladies recently who started the IVF process only to get a natural BFP just before their treatment was due to start , which can only be down to being more relaxed about ttc so maybe starting the adoption process could have the same effect for you ? Could you not go to a different council or perhaps look into adoption agencies ? Good luck whatever you decide to do x
Posted: Fri Jan 07, 2011 12:19 pm
They based the % on the fact we have been trying for so long. Obviously if it was going to happen naturally, it would have happened by now especially as there is no obvious medical reason for it not to have.
I hope that looking forward to starting the adoption process, and even being excited by it will help me relax and then you never know i suppose.
We just need to come to terms with the fact that in reality, we probably will never have our own child and its a tough pill to swallow but im sure when we hear our baby say mummy and daddy for the first time, it wont matter one little bit that the child dosen't share our dna!!