Posted: Tue Aug 23, 2011 11:24 am
Post subject: Pregnant and don't know how to deal with step kids help!
Hi guys new on here,
Really need some advice on step children and how I deal with them, I'm 11 weeks pregnant I'm 22 and partner is 40.
He has 3 children 15,19,21!, they are really kicking off about me being pregnant and I font know how to deal with it it should be an exciting time but I'm really getting down, please help me
Posted: Tue Aug 23, 2011 12:10 pm
Maybe step back a bit and leave your OH to deal with it , It must be a bit of a shock for them especially with you being a similar age to the oldest and there's probably a lot of jealousy and wondering if this means their dads not going to bother with them anymore , once they see things are carrying on as usual then it will probably settle down , teenagers can find the idea of their parent/parents having a baby really hard to cope with but once the baby is here they may surprise you and be really keen to help out, My FIL and his wife had twins last year (he's59 and she's 35) and his DD(17) from another marriage (my OH's half sister) was really unhappy about the idea and played up for a while, but now they're here she's actually moved in with them so she can help his wife out with the twins All your OH can do is reassure them that nothings going to change and he still loves them as much as ever , you could maybe try having a proper adult conversation with them too ? just to try and get to the bottom of why they're so angry about it and let them know that they're causing a lot of stress for you by being like this ( a lot of the time teenagers seem to get so wrapped up in how they feel they forget everyone else has feelings too ) maybe try with the oldest first as at 21 he/she should be mature enough to see both sides ,good luck xx