tantrums-naughty step or ignore?

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hlb
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Posted: Tue Jul 24, 2012 4:23 am 
Post subject: tantrums-naughty step or ignore?
Hi, i haven't been on here in ages but could do with some advice. Oliver is 2 years 3 months and generally very good but as a baby i think we have spoilt him a little. I wouldn't say he's naughty as if i tell him to stop doing something(with an explanation) he will normally stop, my problem is his tantrums. If anything at all doesn't go his way he starts crying, and now throws himself on the floor arms and legs waving around. I've tried ignoring it but it doesn't seem to be working and i just don't know if i should try the naughty step for tantrums.

I have trouble getting him to ask me for things as well which doesn't help. I can generally tell what he wants but if things don't go his way he just stops talking and cries-i continually try to tell him to use his words and tell mummy what he wants but its not working yet. His speech is getting pretty good but he more repeats what we say rather than asking for things so unless i guess what's wrong i end up with him crying again.

Sorry for the rant, i am just looking for some advice, any advice, as to the best way to deal with this. I want to stop this before it gets too bad but this week the tantrums have increased to an hour and a half each time before he calm down!

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steph181
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Posted: Tue Jul 24, 2012 6:10 am 
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i dont think its because he is spoilt, its just normal 2 year olds behaviour!

i do both, start off by ignoring her, then if it builds up to a really big tantrum then put her in her room for time out.
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Trying81andThomas
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Posted: Wed Aug 01, 2012 10:27 pm 
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I'm afraid its the terrible 2's and really not much you can do about the tantrums from starting and happening.
Thomas doesn't have too many screaming episodes, he mainly pouts, sulks and lies on the floor not moving, then moans and stamps his feet.

I do the naughty step if he does something bad. He has 2 minutes, then has to say sorry and we cuddle after. Not sure how much he understands but it works. I've also had him in his bedroom with the door shut but he actually screams and screeches when I do that.
I don't think there is any right or wrong way.
Try star or reward charts. We tried using them for potty training, but he didn't really need them so this has made me think maybe I should use them for this instead.
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libertytmk
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Posted: Thu Aug 02, 2012 7:01 pm 
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I ignore it if its got the point its a tantrum but will give him time out before if his actually misbehaving. The thing with a tantrum is that its not naughty behaviour as such as its their way of expressing themself so I don't want to punish it but obviously don't want to award it either
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Banoffee
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Posted: Fri Aug 03, 2012 2:34 pm 
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As liberty said a tantrum is just a toddlers way of expressing frustration/anger and is not really naughty. Although its really blooming annoying. I find it's best to ignore them and carry on with any tasks as long as they are safe from harm. Don't look at them or talk to them when doing it. As for bad behaviour if after 3 warnings or maybe a count to 10 and they are still doing something naughty then time out in a set area for a length of time you feel appropriate. Most kids soon get the message.
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hlb
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Posted: Fri Aug 03, 2012 9:15 pm 
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Thanks everyone. The majority of the tantrums seem to have stopped for a bit with just a few protests when he's frustrated. I think it was mainly just after he'd been poorly they just seemed twice as bad as normal. I took his ninny(dummy ) away for the first time last night and we're on the second night without it. He struggled to get to sleep but was so tired he managed it in the end. Its the 5 am wake ups that will get me cause he struggling to go back to sleep even before. Hopefully being tired-him and me-won't bring on extra tantrums again!
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hlb
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Posted: Fri Aug 03, 2012 9:18 pm 
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Thanks everyone. The majority of the tantrums seem to have stopped for a bit with just a few protests when he's frustrated. I think it was mainly just after he'd been poorly they just seemed twice as bad as normal. I took his ninny(dummy ) away for the first time last night and we're on the second night without it. He struggled to get to sleep but was so tired he managed it in the end. Its the 5 am wake ups that will get me cause he struggling to go back to sleep even before. Hopefully being tired-him and me-won't bring on extra tantrums again!
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