Is this a really daft idea?

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Weasleywannabe
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Posted: Tue Jan 08, 2013 10:23 pm 
Post subject: Is this a really daft idea?
Hello,
Up until a few days ago I had planned to ensure that my three and a half year old did not come with us to any of our baby scans. He has grandparents who he adores and they are able to look after him for a couple of hours as long as they have a bit of notice. Also, I think that scans are performed, at least in part for clinical reasons so if at all possible children should not attend.

However, my son requires regular hospital appointments that include several tests that involve lying on a bed in a dark room while medical people do non painful and non invasive things to him (much like a scan in pregnancy. He absolutely hates this and becomes so distressed that last time they were unable to perform the tests and get the results they need.

As I have mentioned before, we have had several scans already during this pregnancy so we are unlikely to receive any big surprises at the 20 week scan.

I wondered whether taking him to our 20 week scan so he can see me being scanned might help him. I feel that I need to do everything I can to help him not be so upset and to get the tests he needs.

Is it still a bad idea to take him? Do you think there is a better way to help him?

Thank you very much
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KathG
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Posted: Tue Jan 08, 2013 11:32 pm 
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I think you should take him. Might help with him understanding he is about to become a big brother and make it more real for him too your OH going sure it will be fine for him to sit with him.
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xxHeathxx
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Posted: Wed Jan 09, 2013 7:22 am 
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It sounds like a good idea. Only thing you've got to be careful of if he's likely to become really upset then stress you out. I had to do a flu jab on a lady a few months back. She brought her son with her. He apparently was scared of doctors so by her taking him in a consultation room with me, he thought he was seeing the doctor. He screamed and screamed and was so uncontrollable she nearly couldn't have it done.
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MrsOz
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Posted: Wed Jan 09, 2013 11:25 am 
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I would take him, also forms part of the process of possible bonding and excitement.

Evie came to a number of my appointments, including vaccinations and (opposite to Heather's patient experience) Evie took it within her stride asking questions and watching. She saw me wired up / on drips and drugs at hospital when i had Poppy and asked me questions about what everything meant / was which has helped her understand that I was poorly and so she was very good when I came home with helping me and being careful around me, including why I had to take various pills.

Only you can decide what to do but you do need to predict what his reaction *may* be, if he will react badly then your OH will prob miss out on the scan by taking him out, but if he reacts well it could benefit greatly for him in the future.

xx
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Weasleywannabe
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Posted: Wed Jan 09, 2013 10:34 pm 
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Thank you very much for your replies. I think I will be able to make sure he knows the scan is for Spud and that the doctors are not going to touch him or even go near him. I think we will take him along and see if it helps. DH has said he does not mind if he has to take our son out as he has seen lots of scans already.

Thank you very much
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Weasleywannabe
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Posted: Fri Jan 18, 2013 9:54 pm 
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Hello,
Just thought I would update just in case it is useful to anyone else.

We took our son to the scan today. He was an absolute star. They scanned me for over an hour but our boy was excellent throughout. The doctor did not seem to mind him being there at all. She answered his questions and was very kind to him.

We were given some amazing 3D pictures which I was not expecting.

Thank you
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RachN3Babies
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Posted: Fri Jan 18, 2013 11:24 pm 
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glad you had a good scan and that your little boy got to see Smile we are taking our almost 3 year old to our 4d scan Smile xx
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Weasleywannabe
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Posted: Sun Jan 20, 2013 9:35 pm 
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Hello,
I hope your little boy enjoys the scan. I do not think our son really understood what he was seeing on the screen, but he was still brilliant. We are staying team yellow so we are not able to tell him whether he is having a brother or a sister.

Goodluck and I hope it all goes well and you all enjoy it.
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