Nursery or Grandparents

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Jup
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Posted: Tue Jan 22, 2013 9:42 am 
Post subject: Nursery or Grandparents
I'm going back to work 2 days a week when my baby turns 1. I have the offer of sending him to his grandparents who are in there 60s for both days or I can send him to nursery 1 day and grandparents 1 day (we'll get the nursery place part-funded so money isn't an issue). But am wondering what is best: Grandparents who love him and entertain him a lot or nursery where he'll make friends but won't get as much attention.

What do you think is best?
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Clairebell29
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Posted: Tue Jan 22, 2013 10:13 am 
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Its's a personal thing but I'd be tempted to do one day at Nursery and the other with Grandparents. My Mum has George one day and he goes to childminders 1 1/2 days. Mums not quite 60 but is worn out after having George for the day. He gets very spoilt by her too. Childminder offers him time with other children and a chance to socailise with others outside his own home. Also when you are paying someone you don't feel like you owe them.
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Ange1979
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Posted: Tue Jan 22, 2013 11:07 am 
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It's definitely a personal choice and neither way is wrong Smile My DH works full time and I work part time (5 half days) and we are very lucky to have both sets of grandparents looking after Kimberley whilst I'm at work Smile They all love spending the time together and to be honest, we try and get Kimbs socialising with other kids at wacky warehouses and with friends so I don't feel that she misses out Very Happy We did recently look into nursery however to give everyone a change and decided against it as it wouldn't really be worth me working for the half a day as it would take up most of that money Rolling Eyes Plus everyone is still happy with the situation but if things change, we will definitely look into doing it then. I guess though that if you can get a free nursery place, it would be a nice balance with one day there and one day with grandparents Wink

Hope you manage to decide soon hehe xx
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Xxxpolxxx
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Posted: Tue Jan 22, 2013 11:40 am 
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since my kids have gone to nursery they have come on soo much i would go for one day with grandparents and one at nursery but its a personal choice, i think as you say the grandparents will be able to show him more attention but the nursery is set up so everything they do is for the children and gives them a chance to make friends and interact x
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abbie29
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Posted: Tue Jan 22, 2013 1:39 pm 
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I work 3 days a week and Izzy does a day at Nursery, a day with my MIL and a day with my parents and she loves the variety and I love the saving money bit!! x
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RosP
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Posted: Tue Jan 22, 2013 8:19 pm 
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If money isn't an issue I would go for nursery - apart from anything else if you have your foot in the door there it will give you an option if the grandparents can't take him one week (ill, broken bones, or on holiday), or if work want an extra day as a one-off for any reason. Usually the nursery will let you buy extra days as a one-off if they aren't full.

Another option might be half days at nursery, depending if they could get there to pick him up or drop him off.

Have the grandparents tried having him for the whole day without you around at all to see how it works out? If they are up for it I would look into a class (e.g music, gym) or toddler group that they can take him to on the day they have him.

My kids have learnt loads at nursery and whilst the grandparents love spending time with them I know they'd find the whole day rather too much (they're not local and still work so there was no option for us when I went back to work).
ShevAndNissyNoo
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Posted: Wed Jan 23, 2013 10:23 am 
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Personally I would either do one or the other, I'm a nursery nurse and in my experience I always found that children that only do one day a week don't settle as well because they have a 6 day break in between each visit if you get what I mean xx
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xxOliverAndMaxsMummy
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Posted: Wed Jan 23, 2013 11:11 am 
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I'm with the majority and do one of each then he'll make friends and learn how to bond with children his own age plus its educational too.

Its only once they are toddlers that you may one to increase hours to ensure they fit in, at this age they aren't bothered as I take my little one to a playgroup once a week and he gets on great with the other babies and he never sees them outside of that one group.

Terri xx
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Lilly777
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Posted: Wed Jan 23, 2013 1:38 pm 
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When I went back to work my mum had my LO for the 3 days (a lot of my decision was to do with cost of childcare tho!) and in hindsight I wish I'd goten her into nursery sooner.

As they get older it is so hard to make that change, they get so upset and leaving them breaks your heart whereas if you get them in early, even a day a week it they get used to going and it just becomes the norm.

When my LO was 15 months old I tried to put her into nursery for 1 day a week and both of us were so jupset, I took her out after 2 days ( Embarassed ) and it was another 12 months til I plucked up the courage to try again. She started last February doing 1 day a week and even tho it was hard at first to leave her after a couple of weeks she was actually loving it! Her speech and development skills rocketed and its now lovely to hear her talking about the other little people in her class. She's just increased to 3 days a week due to her grant and (TOUCH WOOD!!) she seems to love it!

Its a totally personal choice, I know kids who havent left their parents or grandparents til they are 3 and start school nursery but at the end of the day, if you can afford any sessions at nursery at all then it really is good for the LO's. They will do things that your parents won't in all senses.....my LO wouldn't use cutlery coz she knew nana or mummy would help her to eat but in nursery she had to do it. Within a month she was asking me for a fork and knife at dinner time!

xx
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Jup
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Posted: Wed Jan 23, 2013 6:40 pm 
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Thank you for your replies. I do agree with you all that it would be nice to have 1 day in the nursery and 1 day at his grandparents. RosP my LO currently stays at his grandparents for the afternoon every week and sometimes he sleeps over, he has done since he was a couple of months old. They love having him and it gives me chance to do the shopping or housework or to chill out for a bit lol. So he is already used to being with his grandparents. But I don't know how he'd get on at nursery as he loves cuddles, and wants lots of physical contact which he won't get at nursery. He doesn't like lots of noise but he loves to be with lots of people and getting lots of attention. 

ShevAndNissyNoo I can also understand what you say about it being hard for him if he attends only once a week. I hadn't thought about it like that. I thought some kids only attend only once or twice a week and they did fine, but maybe that's not the case.
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Xxxpolxxx
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Posted: Wed Jan 23, 2013 7:22 pm 
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i dont no about other nursery but most times when i pick my girls up from nursery they are having a cuddle and if they are upset or fall over they are given a hug so they do get physical attention, also i havr heard my little girl say love you to one of the members of staff and she said it back some parents might not agree with that but i think its nice my kids feel safe there and can have a cuddle when ever they want xx
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xxOliverAndMaxsMummy
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Posted: Wed Jan 23, 2013 7:59 pm 
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Hi

I was going to say the same as pol too. Especially at that age they get loads of cuddles at nursery (so much so that I used to get a little jealous and tearful at first). Whenever they want them. They are usually given a key worker who works with them a lot towards their happiness and development so he will have a special bond with someone who he'll be close too.

Terri xx
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AngelDelight
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Posted: Sat Jan 26, 2013 11:17 pm 
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I would say def do one of each. I was always nervous about sending my ds to nursery but its done him the world of good I think it's great that they experience things we'd probably not do and most importantly mixing with other children is key helps with development and confidence.

I work 3 full days and my ds goes to nursery twice a week and mil one day. This is perfect for us as he's getting the best of both world and now he's older he really looks fwd to both. He's very happy. X
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xTEGx
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Posted: Sun Jan 27, 2013 8:57 am 
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Whatever you decide, I'm sure it will work out fine but if your LO does stay with his grandparents (1 day or 2 days), keep in mind, that if one of them falls ill, you will have to sort out alternative arrangements whereas at nursery you won't have that issue.

Obviously kids do seem to pick up a lot of bugs at nursery but it does help them build up their immunity. My son seemed to pick up a lot in the first year at nursery but over the last 18 months, he has hardly been ill which I think being at nursery in a roundabout way has helped.

All the best.

xTx
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