I feel like I can't cope with my 3 month old baby.

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Strawberryshortcake22
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Posted: Sun Apr 07, 2013 12:16 pm 
Post subject: I feel like I can't cope with my 3 month old baby.
I feel horrible by saying this but I feel like I can't cope with my 13 week old baby. I've just turned 19 and I'm breastfeeding but I've wanted to stop since she was about 5 weeks old. I've tried every bottle/cup/spoon/teat/position possible and nothing has worked. I've kind of got used to the fact I'm not getting her onto a bottle although I try every day and I've started her on baby porridge (recommended by doctor). But after every feed she is sick everywhere, my doctor said the food should help but she's still being sick. So after every feed she's hungry but my milk doesn't come back very quick and I've tried ways to increase my supply. So she's crying cos she's hungry and she will feed for hours because after reflux it comes out really slow. I haven't left her once yet because she wants feeding so much. I leave her for a little while incase she's sick! She won't sit anywhere like a bouncy chair or play mat, I have to hold her everywhere and she will cry until she falls asleep again. It's not a pain cry it's just when I put her down. I feel like I cant even go out with her because I don't like feeding in public and where I live feeding facilities are terrible so I want to sit in my house everyday. She won't take a dummy either and wants to suck on my boob constantly. I just feel like I can't cope and I don't know what to do, sorry for the long post.
MrsOz
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Posted: Sun Apr 07, 2013 7:30 pm 
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Contact your HV to ask for advise to mix feeding / moving her onto a bottle. Don't struggle on your own. My sis had HV advice bc her twins are like this (still, at 6 months, and both in three hour routines, both BF'd), and was advised to feed at specific times rather than on demand or when convenient, so that the babies go into a routine of meals rather than snacks and comfort. My poor sis is exhausted.

I am really surprised your Dr advised early feeding, considering guidelines are at 6 months. Is there a reason why he has suggested this as your baby's stomach may not be ready which could cause her more discomfort.

My first child was a whingy baby, couldn't do anything with her. I found lying her down with her nappy off helped, as well as a soothing bath at bed, but day times I ended up carrying her in a baby carrier on my front so I could just get on with stuff.

Hope things get better for you xx
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Raspich
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Posted: Sun Apr 07, 2013 10:53 pm 
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I would agree, baby porridge is probably not a great idea. Their little tummies can't really cope with it til they are older - my daughter struggles with porridge now and she is 6 months.

Please don't struggle alone, it does sound like reflux from my limited knowledge and drs/HV should be able give you advice. The HV may also be able to give u advice on how to stop bf if that's what you want. Combination feeding may be a good solution, though if u sort the reflux bf should be easier (I would worry that formula may make it worse)

I thought I'd be reluctant to bf in public but with a bit of practice I've found it's quite easy to be discreet, a vest to pull down and a loose top to pull up is best - the the loose top can cover u. My thoughts are that people wouldn't be offended by someone in a bikini, no one has ever said anything to me or even looked twice (apart from young children)

Hope things get better soon! X
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CathySmith
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Posted: Fri Apr 19, 2013 10:47 pm 
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Yeah I agree with the above. Baby porridge never really worked for me, but I have heard good things about it from other people. But that is besides the point; so far you have tried it and it doesn't work for you, so try something else. Call your doctor (maybe a different doctor) and see what else he could recommend to you. Best of luck!

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hayley2903
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Posted: Wed Apr 24, 2013 11:00 pm 
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I would say reflux issues too!

Please don't feel like this, go and speak to your health visitor.
Babies can be quite particular, Lola wasn't happy in many places either but she was happy on the sofa in a blanket. Some like moses baskets as they're smaller and some like more space such as a cot so try changing this.
Lola also loves her pram so if she ever struggled to sleep or was restless when I wanted to put her down i'd pop her In her pram!
What dummy do you use? Lola wouldn't take a certain dummy, I switched to a cherry teat and she took that!
I had my daughter at the same age (im 20 now), message me if you like xx
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Raspich
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Posted: Thu Apr 25, 2013 9:04 pm 
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My daughter also hated the orthopedic dummies and has to have a cherry teat. As Hayley says keep trying different things - babies are all different and some may love their moses baskets others hate it. My daughter doesnt tend to sleep in the car (especially if I'm desperate for her to have a nap!) where as all my friends are 'oh, well if she/he wont sleep I just go out for a drive'.

With the going out look online for where has good facilities - My local Mothercare (I'm assuming all mothercare's) has a lovely room specifically for feeding.

You may have to bite the bullet and put her down for a few minutes at a time, then pick her up and give her a cuddle. It might help her to get used to it (I personally wouldnt leave my baby to cry for long amounts of time).

I am surprised the dr hasnt perscribed gaviscon (or there are other things) for her reflux.

I hope that things have got easier for you. x x
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MrsOz
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Posted: Fri Apr 26, 2013 6:40 pm 
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we also used cherry teats with my first... and tapped on it rhythmically until she would suck on it.

xx
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bbysad
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Posted: Tue Apr 30, 2013 4:55 pm 
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i cant really help but if you really want little one off the breast (because you feel little one is not getting enough) it may be a long shot but what about nipple gaurds and try using it as a boob instead (like a bottle to begin with then slowly introduce the bottle in to the nipple gaurd (dont know if it will work but might be worth a try ) if you want me to explain more i will try as it is only a thought hun xx
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Raspich
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Posted: Tue Apr 30, 2013 6:12 pm 
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thats not a bad idea - i did that in reverse, used the nipple guard to go from bottle to breast! Smile
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bbysad
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Posted: Sun May 05, 2013 11:54 am 
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tbh i have never done it as my boobs dry up way too quick (hope it has helped i have heard that nipple gaurds were good for nipple's so thought maybe use it the other way around ( maybe over a tommy tippee bottle coz there teats are roughly the same size as a woman's breast ) good luck hun xxx
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Raspich
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Posted: Sun May 05, 2013 5:33 pm 
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Ah well my daughter took 5 weeks to latch and using nipple guards helped her figure out how to breast feed Very Happy
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bbysad
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Posted: Mon May 06, 2013 7:04 pm 
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sweet hun i would of loved to do the breast feeding just dry up to quick Sad unfortunatly mind you my 17month old bit my boob the other day and wow did it hurt full set of front teeth so im now thinking im glad i didnt give bubs my boobs lol Laughing
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Corynn
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Posted: Sat May 11, 2013 6:48 pm 
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I think you can also ask your doctor for something to stop the milk if you want to stop completely.
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