a few questions on surrogacy

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AmelieH
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Posted: Fri May 27, 2016 10:40 am 
Post subject: a few questions on surrogacy
Hi everyone who remembers me.

As Iíve promised, I start a new thread here. I would like to get advice and tip from those who have already passed through an intricate way of surrogacy. Your experience is priceless.
Truly speaking, I have never thought that Iíll ever think of surrogacy. Actually, me and my dh didnít want to have children for a long time. Probably, too long. We led a very active way of life, we were always on a move, overwhelmed with our careers and travels. There was no place for a child in our busy lives.

Finally, we understood that weíre getting older and our life in incomplete with having no one to care and to take care of us. But it was probably too late. I was diagnosed with endometriosis, and finally they told me that I will never have a chance to have a baby. Never. I wish I was wiser before, but there were other things that cared me at that time.
At the moment, weíre opting surrogacy, but weíre quite illiterate in this sphere, so I would be grateful if someone could explain. Thereíre a few questions that we have by now: what are our chances for success of ivf taken weíre aged 46 and 49. What if it fails? How many attempts do we have?

Also, shall we be able to choose a surrogate who will be carrying our child? how can we be in control of pregnancy?
Sorry, for so many questions at once. Actually, I have much more, but these ones are the most crucial by now.

I will be grateful for any guidance
LadyButterfly
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Posted: Wed Jun 01, 2016 6:41 am 
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Amelie, I see you started a new thread as you promised. Great. Well, yes, I thinks itís more appropriate to discuss this question is surrogacy board. As Iíve told before, Iím very supportive of your decision to pursue surrogacy even though my infertility journey ended up in adoption. we all take our own decisions. I know a lot about art and ivf because we tried it for 5 times with my dh. Unfortunately, it didnít work for us. I donít know a lot about surrogacy, actually. I can only guess that this is a mine field, as well as adoption. Youíd better choose your facilitator very carefully. Are you going to refer to your local clinic or go domestically?
David27
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Posted: Wed Jun 01, 2016 9:41 am 
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I know that you will start throwing stones at me now, but I still think that adoption is much more socially needed type of parenting than surrogacy. This is my point of view. Correct me if Im wrong. In any case, you have a right for your personal opinion and I appreciate it. Good luck to you on the bendy way you have chosen.
Drop a line when any news, ok?
AmelieH
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Posted: Wed Jun 01, 2016 12:17 pm 
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David, youíre not the one to judge. In any case, thanks for appreciating my decision. Yes, weíre all different and have different circumstances that lead us to this or that decision.
BabyFranka
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Posted: Wed Jun 01, 2016 12:44 pm 
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This isnít a point of argument, David.

As well, the OP didnít ask what is wrong and what is right. She ask certain questions. If you have answers, share them. If not, just pass this thread by.

Chiao
Aaarggh
Katherine01
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Posted: Thu Jun 02, 2016 7:05 am 
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Amelie, thereíre are a lot of agencies that offer qualified surrogacy services in different countries of the world. Mind that these agencies take additional charges for their services. In reality, they just cooperate with a certain clinic. You can always contact a reproductive clinic directly. You will save a lot of money and time.
Taz84
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Posted: Mon Jun 06, 2016 3:08 pm 
Post subject: Surrogacy
Hi Amelie,

Surrogacy can be a very daunting journey to take and it's understandable there may be doubts. I take it you're based in the UK right? Well surrogacy in the UK is a bit complicated as the surrogate retains parental rights over the child regardless of sharing DNA or not.

Many couples are turning to countries such as the Ukraine where surrogacy laws are defined clearly and parental rights are based on DNA and not on who gave birth.

My advice to you is that if this the route you want to go down then go with a clinic and not an agency. This means you will have direct contact with the people in charge of the treatments rather than middle men.

I hope I've been of help to you.

All the best in your future!
MommyAg
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Posted: Wed Jun 29, 2016 1:20 pm 
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Amelie,
I hope you found the way.
for us, surrogacy came out as the last chance of having one more baby (I'm already a mom of my gorgeous son who is 3, but i can't have any more children).
we were also advised to try Ukraine because of favorable legislation and moderate prices.
this monday, my dh and I are taking a flight to Kyiv for our introductory meeting with three clinic's representatives. if interested, just pm me next week and I will let you know about our ideas and final choice.

sincerely
Katherine01
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Posted: Thu Jun 30, 2016 9:43 am 
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MommyAg wrote:
Amelie,
I hope you found the way.
for us, surrogacy came out as the last chance of having one more baby (I'm already a mom of my gorgeous son who is 3, but i can't have any more children).
we were also advised to try Ukraine because of favorable legislation and moderate prices.
this monday, my dh and I are taking a flight to Kyiv for our introductory meeting with three clinic's representatives. if interested, just pm me next week and I will let you know about our ideas and final choice.

sincerely



sorry for you
smth went wrong during the first delivery?
the reason for surrogacy must be very serious for you, sorry
where are you travelling from, btw?
MommyAg
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Posted: Fri Jul 01, 2016 8:29 am 
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yes, something definitely went wrong Sad Sad

I don't even want to recall how it all happened. now I don't have uterus anymore, but I have my ovaries and they advised me to use surrogacy with my own eggs. do I have any other choice. for us it's the only solution now. we made peace with this idea. my dh wants a daughter so much. we will be happy to have one more boy as well. if only it worked...
to answer your question, we're travelling from Norway and our son will stay here with his grandparents.
BabyFranka
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Posted: Fri Jul 01, 2016 8:46 am 
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MommyAg wrote:
yes, something definitely went wrong Sad Sad

I don't even want to recall how it all happened. now I don't have uterus anymore, but I have my ovaries and they advised me to use surrogacy with my own eggs. do I have any other choice. for us it's the only solution now. we made peace with this idea. my dh wants a daughter so much. we will be happy to have one more boy as well. if only it worked...
to answer your question, we're travelling from Norway and our son will stay here with his grandparents.



dear, you suffered a lot. however, you have your son who is your delight and I'm sure he is your everything. I hope he will be blessed of having a sister. i agree that surrogacy on your own eggs is the perfect solution to your condition. hope it works. hope it will be a girl as you want. or may be two more kids? have you thought of it?

i just want you to have a good and informative trip and to make a right choice of your surrogacy provider.

PS it was a right decision to leave your son at home. i believe such a long trip will be exhausting for him.

take care and let us know the result of your trip Very Happy
Tay26lor
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Posted: Tue Jul 12, 2016 1:11 am 
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I'm so sorry about your situation, hun. I also can't carry a baby by myself. I was born without an uterus. There is no chance for me to get pregnant and feel my baby pushing into my stomach. Still I'm grateful there are places and people who can help us with our problem. At the same time this is really hard to find good agency or clinic. There are so many scammers, who want to become rich, using poor people like us. We were looking for reliable clinic with professional doctors and high rate of successful treatments. We decided to concentrate mostly on Europe. As India was closed, we were choosing between Russia and Ukraine. Ultimately we chose Ukrainian clinic. Reviews were mostly positive and this clinic has high success rates. Though we had some doubts about their medicine, we decided to go there and check everything. Our concerns faded away when we talk to our doctor and program coordinator. We saw fashionable design of the clinic and modern equipment. And the most important we saw so many couples there! People all over the world came to this clinic for surrogacy and de ivf programs. We have no regrets! We are so lucky we went straight to this clinic. Our daughter Kristine was born in May last year. We celebrated her first birthday 2 weeks ago. I hope this info will help you. I wish you good luck with your procedure!
MommyAg
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Posted: Wed Jul 13, 2016 9:55 am 
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great to learn your successful outcomes of fertility struggle stories. i hope we all will find the way
i'm writing this to update you with my news. our two days in Kyiv, Ukraine ended up with signed contract with Biotexcom. hopefully, our tests were ok and they allowed us trying on our own eggs. in any case, even if the first attempt fails, they will try again but with the other surrogate. btw, they do not allow choosing gestational carrier there. at first, i got upset by it, but they explained that the doctor appoints surrogate based on medical criteria. This is all that matters Ďcause she doesnít have any genetic relation to fetus. So, now weíre waiting to be matched with a surrogate and starting my hormonal stimulation for super ovulation. To tell the truth, I was really shocked how many medicines and injections shall I take before eggs retrieval. My first child was conceived naturally so Iím an absolute newbie in all this assisted reproduction.
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