Posted: Thu Mar 06, 2014 10:02 am
Post subject: peoples re-actions to infertility & moving on
Hiya... I just wondered how you have found peoples re actions to your infertility - we seem to have lost touch with so many people that can't see why we 'can't just get over it' or take us putting ourselves first as a complete personal act of bitterness & hate towards them - or if we were real friends we could just put it to one side! that works both ways though - right? I have never said I am not happy for people or not sent cards or congratulations wishes when they have produced.
Surely attending 'baby showers' & maternity hospitals would just make a mockery of our pain and suffering? I feel I cannot win!! :'(
any similar experiences? xx
Posted: Thu Mar 06, 2014 5:19 pm
Hi Lilyboo I know exactly how you mean, I think a lot of people tend to brush it under the carpet and not speak to you about it(I don't know if that's because they done care of they don't know what to say!)
Over the last few years iv really started to realise who matters and who understands or TRYS to understand our position. In the last 5 months iv got married, had failed IVF, a miscarriage and my Dad passed away very suddenly and it hurts so much that some of the people you think"are there for you" actually aren't!!
I don't think people realise how much it hurts to buy congratulations cards and presents and things all the time!!! One thing it does im sure you will agree is make you relationship/marriage stronger! xxxx
Posted: Fri Mar 07, 2014 9:23 am
thanks for your reply charleelou - I do agree with you totally about that
So sorry to hear about all you have been through and to have your dad pass away must have been such a terrible time for you.
I used to be a very sociable person but these days its pretty much just me and hubby everything has changed so much because of our situation. even family that were once very close are distant now - we really worry about doing the right thing all the time and that people see we are trying but it never seems to work out like that, we always end up seen to be in the wrong!!
nice to talk to someone else in a similar situation