Posted: Sun Mar 23, 2008 12:52 am
you are absoloutly hilarious!!!!
im haveing a really boring night in on my own (pregnancy hormones got me in a bit of a tiff way my partner). and i cant sleep at all, so just messing about online, and have to say your first comment back there really made me laugh out loud!
pertalou, hope everything goes well for you and baby.
Posted: Mon Mar 24, 2008 4:11 pm
that story sums up men really - mine would do the same - like i said his response will be i just have to send an email or something similar - anyway - he just isnt a hugley thoughtful type - some are- some arent - i just try to hightlight stuff as it happens - but do try to keep a lid on it as best as my hormonal self can do - we were away at the weekend visiting family etc and he and his mother were busy organising my wedding - (i might add nothing needs doing !) anyway he had read a bridal magazine and hey presto was now the wedding planner of the year - shame it all got done 6 weeks ago but never mind - anyway we argued on the underground and in the shops for 45 minutes - was so past caring about what other people thought - he was being a tosser and his mother wasnt exactly helping - his problem is that he never ever listens - gets very tiring indeed -
your not alone with an imperfect partner but i doubt the "perfect" one really exists LOL
Posted: Tue Mar 25, 2008 11:48 am
oh i can give you oodles to laugh at - like the cat puked on a pine chest of drawers which i painstakingly restored myself last year - anyway J poured disinfectant over puke left it them scrubbed it off but.... the disinfectant stained the wood green so when i was in the bath last night he got some sandpaper out the garage and sanded it off !! my mother just said "how bloody stupid can he be" remember this is a man who has a PHD and is a qualified dentist - has an IQ off the scale but has zilch common sense LOL
oh and another good one was making bread in the bread machine - didnt use the measuring cup just used a large coffee mug - leave the rest to your imagination to guess what happened next !!
Posted: Tue Mar 25, 2008 2:27 pm
Oh god the drawers thats painful, but bread maker what a donut lol Funny but both my kids go to Grammar School (god only knows where they get their brains from) and they are both very clever academically, but if my daughter (she is 15) attempts anything in the kitchen then all hell breaks loose, she had a friend over and they tried to make an omlette, well the worktop was covered in egg, running down the cupboards and what they left in the frying pan was just beyond words, needless to say they didnt eat it, left the mess and made some crumpets, guess who got to load the dishwasher, she tells me she wants to babysit the new baby
Think the moral of that story is you either get brains or common sense, never both lol
Keep them coming - Flossie xx
Posted: Tue Mar 25, 2008 4:31 pm
ladies- can i just say that after feeling v sorry for myself having been struck down by sickness bug all weekend, your posts have hugely cheered me up! Soooo funny. incidentally i can sympahise re: brains vs common sense. My own cat came out in sympathy on Saturday and decided to be sick on the throw at the end of my bed. This was really last thing i needed given that i was being sick every hour on the hour. other half went into blind panic and tried to bundle throw into washing machine (without removing any of the sick, sorry if too much info!) of course it didnt fit so it was down to me to get in car and take to launderette and then clean washing machine. just what i wanted to do! honestly, lack of common sense never ceases to amaze me. lets hope our little ones inherit this trait from us!!
Posted: Tue Mar 25, 2008 6:22 pm
Lol - Must have been sympathy from the cat!! Must have been a weekend for it - my son aged 12 had a really bad headache on Sun night and began throwing, miraculously throwing up into his bin rather than creating a mess on the bed and carpet, other half flew up the stairs and bravely said "any clearing up to be done" and spontaneously began baulking at the smell (sorry about tmi but son had been eating tangy cheese doritos) after sorting son out found other half leaning over staircase sweating profusely, granted the thought was there but hey could have made the situation 10 times worse. Bloody drama queen......
Sozzle its just not a man thing to scrape sick off first - where did he think the lumps would go? Hope you feel better soon, glad we cheered you up, this one could run for ever............................
Posted: Wed Mar 26, 2008 12:35 pm
Agreed Flossie! When i asked why he hadnt removed excess first with loo paper or tissue he looked at me as if i was mad!! I did try to explain logistics of lumps vs. washing machine drainage there was a flicker of understanding which was encouraging given that husband is a TRAINED ENGINEER!!!!!!! heaven help us when the baby arrives i can see poo and sick going everywhere -chuckle!!
Posted: Thu Mar 27, 2008 5:22 pm
am so laughing at these posts ! glad i am not the only one with a "numpty" other half well ok a numpty with a high IQ !!! god love them eh !!!
all my animals are pushing the limit at the moment and the way i am feeling they will all be rehomed by the weekend !! puke poo etc etc .....
oh and the other week other half had man flu !! you would have though the earth had stopped turning - i tell you it ceases to amaze me about men and sickness - all i could say is jump into my skin for 24 hrs of hormonal sickness then you can complain !!
did i tell you about baking bacon or the chicken breasts or the sausage in the oven without putting them in a dish !! selective hearing yet again seems no matter how many lessons in kitchen utensils and even the basic tin foil failed to reach the inner cortex of said numpty brain !
Posted: Thu Mar 27, 2008 7:10 pm
Hey girls - after being away from this forum for quite a few weeks now I came on here looking for a laugh as my boss is being a right b*tch at the moment and i swear i am going to have to do double pelvic floor exercises tonight to strengthen those muscles!!! My husband has had an attack of 'dying man syndrome' this last few weeks where everytime I complain about sore feet, sore back, having humungous heaving boobs annoying me, etc he HAS to make sure he is suffering from something too!!!!! He has just taken a whole week off work cos he allegedly hurt his back washing the car.I sent him to the docs after 3 days cos i was fed up of him moaning like a banshee and (this is the funniest bit!) all the doc said was "the only reason your back is sore mr archibald is because you've put on so much weight you're walking like an overstuffed pillow" - laugh? I nearly wet myself when he came home and told me! His whole family are a bunch of skivers and call sickies all the time for nothing so my MIL tried to give me a row for not giving him sympathy! xxxxxxxx
Posted: Thu Mar 27, 2008 7:41 pm
Lol This is my absolute favourite thread I so look forward to reading everyones posts, cjarchibald the overstuffed pillow is a classic, I cant believe he told you what doc said think my other half may have lied lol. Gingin your bloke is the stuff books are written about - probably really not funny at the time but absolutely makes me want to laugh so much my pelvic floor wants to give way Talking of sausages, my lovely boy (aged 12) he really is a lovely lovely boy, really clever academically - but on Sunday morning I was having a well earned lie in and I heard him putting his breakfast in the microwave (he has 2 weetabix and warm milk every morning), mmm all ok so far, he then came up and said "mum I cooked myself a sausage sandwich" I laughed and said I dont think so I heard the microwave chuckle chuckle, to which he replied "I cooked the sausages in the microwave" OH MY GOD - panic stations. he had cooked 2 bloody pork sausages, so there I was having thoughts of buckets and puke all day on the phone to NHS Direct felt a right donut. He was absolutely fine, not even an upset tummy......paranoid mother syndrome.
Posted: Thu Mar 27, 2008 7:48 pm
Flossie my hubby was insistent mhe made my tea the other day and all i had dreamt of all day was a burger in a nice soft roll with some salad. he went and bought nice 100% beef ones from asda and although they were frozen he'd tried his best and had bought mozzarella slices and relish etc to make it all pretty.......he then cooked them in the oven "medium-rare" for me and produced this plate of soggy, wet undercooked salmonella burger which not even the dog would go near. I was devastated and in my hormonal state burst into tears! 10 mins later we ordered chinese!!!!!!!!!!!!!