Posted: Tue Nov 11, 2008 4:12 pm
hi ladies, cant believe im joining this side! Dont have very many yet but
1. RELAX, you can do it, even if u think u cant/wont be able to listen to one more cry!!!
2. NO visitors if u dont feel like it
3. accept help when offered, if u feel like it, i couldnt have done without my mum!!!
Posted: Tue Nov 11, 2008 6:18 pm
I hate to say it, but I'm sure that I'm not alone. If you ever feel that suddenly you can't cope with a screaming baby, put them somewhere safe i.e cot and just shut the door and walk out of the room for a few minutes. Some times things can get too much and you just need to calm yourself down.
Posted: Tue Nov 11, 2008 6:25 pm
owh i have another one, to me its was a very important one
get involved in as many play groups and mother and baby groups as poss, i started getting lonely and then found out about these groups, me and my kids have made soo many great friends from these groups and it gets you out the house with other mums going through the same as you
there are groups everywhere and there are also classes like, baby massage, baby sign, jumping beans, jelly club, sports bugs, boogie babies, well the list is endless
Posted: Tue Nov 11, 2008 7:44 pm
I have another one. When you take them for their jabs:
- Try to stay relaxed, as they will pick up on it if you are worried
- Dose them up with calpol before they go to dull the pain
- Dress them in something easy to undo at the bottom e.g. sleepsuit or popper up dungarees etc.. so you don't have to try to dress a screaming baby or undress them completely for the jabs.
Can you tell Poppy had hers today?
Posted: Tue Nov 11, 2008 10:40 pm
Ha ha Lucky Lewis had his 2nd jabs today and I did all of the above too!! Another thing I do (on advice from the wonderful Amy Picot!) is to take a small bottle of milk (or just your boob if you're b/feeding!) to soothe them afterwards even if they're not due a feed. Just a little to distract them a bit. Old Macdonald (again!) also works a treat if you are good at the pig snorting noise!!! xxxx
P.S. I have asked Hannah to put this on a sticky for all the PG girls xxxx
I'm not on here all the time so if you need anything PM me Arch x
Posted: Wed Nov 12, 2008 4:59 pm
Hi my top tips are just from my experience
1) keep a box or couple of ready made cartons of formula in if breastfeeding i got really sore and ended up having a trip to all night shop with savoy cabbage leafs on boobs at 4am, in tears cos i cudnt feed my boy(it hurt too much...turned out i had thrush) dont be ashamed if u have to give an odd feed of formula u need to be happy 2!
2) not all babies need to go onto hungrier baby milk as i found out, my son was bad on stage 2 and i was advised to go back to stage one and stick with it till weaning...only change if u really have to...cos they will always get bellyache for a while when changed
3) if u are single and find it hard not having extra pair of hands around...i got a cheap 2nd hand electronice swing (20quid on e-bay) and when hes tired and just wants cuddling to sleep it works a treat so my hands are free for washing bottles etc, he didnt take to it until about a month old though
an a tip for all new mothers when baby chokes while feeding or spewing, dont panic, it can be scarey 1st time,as it seems like they dont breathe for ages but usually sitting them up a pat on back and a cuddle sorts it straight out
hope these help x
Posted: Thu Nov 13, 2008 2:35 pm
Sorry got a few more!
1. Buy a book about baby massage I am convinced that it's the reason Toby is such a relaxed baby and when we don't do it he does have a worse nights sleep!
2. Ask people to bring you food when you're in hospital after the labour you have no idea how awful the rubbish they serve you is! On the good side they love to give you good cups of tea!
3. DO NOT feel guilty about things whether it's not breastfeeding, using a dummy, using a comforter or even walking out the room for two mins to stop yourself hating your baby when it won't stop crying REMEMBER YOU'RE ONLY HUMAN AND RAISING A CHILD IS STRESSFUL!
4. Go to toddler groups having a big group of mummy friends is a life saver!
Posted: Thu Nov 13, 2008 11:49 pm
Buy a washing up bowl - when we bought our bab home we tried to bath him in the baby bath he was so tiny the baby bath seemed so big it felt so hard - so his daddy ran out and bought a washing up bowl - it a thousand times easier to manage in the first couple of weeks.
Swaddling can really help a baby sleep my baby always would wake himself because his arms would just jump out in his sleep (i cant remember what the reflex action is called) swaddling would stop this and so he would sleep for longer.
Also I found a nice evening routine which at first he fought against but now he loves helps - I like to bath him, then give hima nice little baby massage, swaddle (though he is to old now), Read to him and feed him then burp him (by then his eyes are almost shut - If his mouth is open I sneak in a dummy) this sounds like it takes up a lot of time but it doesnt and its lovely.
If your baby hates baths put a wet face cloth on their tummy during the bath it makes them feel more secure.
I think sleepers (baby grows) are the most comfortable cheapest thing a baby can where _ you cant own enough
Also I was a paranoid nervous wreak over him being to hot so my sister sent me a Gro bag egg as a pressie which put my mind at ease.
I also would say buy a nasal aspirator (for colds), A cot wedge ( its like a foam triangle pillow that you put in the cot and puts baby slightly on a tilt - I needed this because it seemed like every time I lay matteo flat in his basket or cot he start heaving an make himself sick), A bottle of colief if the baby gets colic.
I would definatly agree that you should keep guests to the minimum within 45 minutes of my baby being born I had people coming in I was to polite to tell them to leave, FOr the first few days people were round all the time it was horrible and overwhelming and hey were holding the baby more often then me. It really made my baby blues 100% worse My OH's sister realised this and on about day 4 of being home she told everyone to not visit me for a day (she applied this rule to herself), which helped.
And also find at least one mother and baby group - Its a life saver honestly
Posted: Fri Nov 14, 2008 6:16 pm
Post subject: Top Tips
1. Have hubby take off as much time as he can so you can get through the first month together - as much as your finances can afford - it's worth it!
2. Involve him in every aspect of baby's care that you can - get up in the night together - this makes you a team.
3. Ban family for as long as you need to - we banned them for a month! - It gave us time to get to know our baby and become our own family without interference.
4. Listen to all advice, but use only what you need.
5. Avoid judgmental mommies. I BF, cloth diaper, and gave birth w/o drugs, but I could care less if you had an elective C-section, bottle feed and use disposables. As long as we love our babies we should all be accepting - everyone needs friends and support, and we all know ourselves and how best to make a happy family. Look for friends and practice being a good friend who can listen.
6. Try swaddling - our guy only did it for one month, but it was great. Take cues on when to stop swaddling - he hated it after those four weeks.
7. If you use cloth diapers, wear onesies and sleepers that are a size too big - you can also buy extenders, which lengthen the crotch area.
8. If you plan to cloth diaper, buy just a few of several kinds at first to figure out what works for you. Same with bottles.
9. Start bottles around 3-4 weeks if you plan to use them in addition to BFing, and give baby one every other day - otherwise the bottle may get rejected.
10. Stay calm!
If you have good advice on how to make bath time and bed time relaxing and pleasant - let me know! Our baby is awesome 21 hours of the day, but very fussy from 6-9 pm and hates being bathed. I think I must be missing something with bath time!
Posted: Fri Nov 14, 2008 9:36 pm
Have you tried baby massage? Lots of people swear by that to calm baby. Also maybe try doing bedtime a bit earlier. Poppy's bedtime has slowly moved earlier from about 9pm to before 7pm, as otherwise she just gets herself worked up being tired. Another trick someone suggested with bathtime is to lay a warm wet flannel over their tummies in the bath as it makes them feel warmer and more secure. Just a few suggestions, hope some of them help.
Posted: Fri Nov 14, 2008 9:54 pm
Yeah it sounds like 6pm could be her natural bedtime when she is overtired. Lewis was the same between 8-1am and we eventually realised he wanted to go to sleep at 8pm! He now goes to bed between 7-8 and no more crying evenings xxxxxxxx
I'm not on here all the time so if you need anything PM me Arch x
Posted: Tue Nov 18, 2008 10:51 pm
Another tip i have is, it may sound silly but don't be a fool to advertising... it's bad but it's true that many companies prey on the nervous side of being a first time mum, before you buy something that looks a bit gimmicky and expensive, check out if there is a cheaper version, or a natural way to do it... eg we havent bought a pillow wedge thing instead we have a blanket folded up under bradens cot sheet where his head is, he sleeps loads better and it didnt cost us £20!
If you can afford it fair enough, but just saying there is more often then not an easier and cheaper way of doing things!
Posted: Wed Nov 19, 2008 7:26 pm
Post subject: When did your baby start sleeping and stop fussing?
Thanks for the replies, ladies. Good advice! I am suspicious that some of the fussiness is just age and/or weight. I've been working on an earlier bedtime and alternately early evening nap time to ward off grumpiness, but nothing has worked yet. Griffin is 10 weeks old and about 11 pounds. When did your babies stop the evening fussing? How much did they weigh? I've heard that 16 pounds is magical - then their systems are mature enough to sleep through the night.[/code]