single mum with 2nd on the way

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wobble511
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Joined: 07 Apr 2009
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Posted: Wed Jun 03, 2009 10:37 am 
Post subject: single mum with 2nd on the way
i'm in need of some friendly advice and moral support. I've been with my husband for 7 years and married for 2 of them, we have a 5 year old together and I'm now 13weeks preg with baby number 2. As my husband is much older than me he has grown up children of his own, out of four kids he has only been congratulated by one of them. The major problem is that one of his kids (which i used to get on with really well since i had my son kieran, we were able to bond over him) still lives at home, he has been really abusive towards me and my husband (only verbally), but we (me and the stepson) had a big argument which he made me feel very scared as i'm only tiny and he towers over me. Needless to say i have moved out of the family home and living with my mom and dad (who have been great). With my emotions all over the place i don't know what to do, as i no longer wish to live with my step son but i'm not a heartless person and no that he can't afford to live in the big wide world and i can't ask my husband to kick him out, as he spent years fighting for custody of the kids. While i've been living with my parents i've had time not only to think about when to move back home (if i do) but about my relationship with my husband which to be honest has been s**t for a while so a baby is the last thing we need but its happened. My husband was very supportive at first but i've been with my parents now for three weeks and he feels thats long enough and should move back home, which i don't feel save in doing but he wont listen to that. We've had a good talk and i've told him that i need my own time and space to think things though but being a man in one ear and out the other. As we work together i've tried to be nice at work but one day his fine with me the next his a t**t. Part of me wants thing to get better so that i can move back home, but then a big part of me wants to say f**k off and find my own feet and get my own place and do things on my own. I feel very torn and don't know what to do, any advice and support would be greatful to help get me through this tough time. Thanx
helenm73
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Joined: 16 Feb 2009
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Posted: Wed Jun 03, 2009 11:47 am 
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hi there,
i hope u r ok hun..
gosh this is a hard one
firstly i would say if u do not feel safe at home then do not go back till u do..
this behaviour from ur stepson is totally unexceptable
how old is he?
his father should be laying down some rules for him,
just by ur post i can tell ur not a heartless person,but it is ur home and u should not be scared to live in it..if he is over 18 then im afraid i would be telling him 2 leave till he can control his temper..
good luck..x
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