Posted: Tue Aug 18, 2009 2:06 am
Post subject: Young parents
I know there is a increase of teenage parents out there now, but would any one be able to give any advice? Im 19 and my boy friend is only 17. He decided he wanted to try for a baby so i agreed as i really do want one. I think my boy friend is just a bit worried because of his age.
Hes going to be in college and if i am pregnant the baby wont be due till 6th may. He wants to be there for me all the way through. What can i say to him? I love the fact he wants to be there for me. Its nice hes not running off and getting scared. To be honested i think hes more excited about it then me. Which isnt a bad thing.
We are going to keep trying if i fail.
It just feels so right.
I also think hes worried his dad will kick him out. Does any one know anything about finding your own place? Or renting a flat? Me and him will prob have to get our own place next year.
Posted: Tue Aug 18, 2009 8:24 am
I'm 19 as well so hopefully I can see where u are coming from. In regards to a house/flat you will be able to get somewhere as you are over 18. I dont know how it would work though as your boyfriend is only 17 so he is not actually classed as an adult yet.
Although having a baby is a wonderful thing and you are old enough to make your own decisions, your boyfriend is only 17, and at college. How would he be able to support you and a baby ...does he have a job or any money coming in ?! Do you have a job or are u in college yourself as well?
The fact that he is worried about what his dad will say shouldnt really matter, at the end of the day some parents can be upset and worried when their daughter/son is going to be a parent - my mom cried and then didnt talk to me for a week but they get over it and now she is as excited as me ! !
I dont know if i have been much help to you but I think you should really think about having a baby before just deciding to rush into it...
If you want to chat or ask me anything dont hesitate xx
Posted: Tue Aug 18, 2009 5:40 pm
Try and get in contact with someone like the GFS platform that works with pregnant and young mums between 15 -25. They can provide help with housing and advice on benefits and anything else you need help with etc. Whilst it caters for really young mums I'm 22 and find it helpful going there just for the social aspect.
If theres not a GFS platform in your area look for a Young Womens/ Young Mens project they will know your local area and give you any advice you need.
Posted: Tue Aug 18, 2009 5:52 pm
I'm 19 aswell hun and just want to say make sure it's 100% what you want.
Loads of girls decide they want babies without realising just how much work it's going to be. But then i know of a few girls that tried for a baby at 19/20 and they are some of the most amazing mummies i have ever seen!!
My pregnancy wasn't planned but i wouldn't change it for the world now.
Do you have a job? You need to make sure your financially stable and as your boyfriend will be at college you might not have enough money coming in?
Posted: Thu Aug 20, 2009 8:36 am
you need to have certain things before i feel having a baby is right:
a place of your own
im 19 and we have our own house and good jobs - even with the security we have, its still so so hard. it puts so much stress on your relationship, not one minute to yourself, no more romantic nights together. no sleep no money. you have the rest of your life to have a baby, enjoy yourself while you can
Posted: Sat Aug 22, 2009 4:46 pm
I would say you deff need a place of your own. I couldn't cope living with anyone else and a baby. You need to be somewhere comfortable to raise your baby. You should be able to rent. Me and my husband rented our flat at 17 &18, he just had to sign everything as he was over 18. However if going through a letting agent a lot refuse to rent to 18s and you have to have a guarentor if you're under 21. You could apply to the local council/housing association. I agree with Cash, how are you both going to support yourself, especially if your bf is at college still. It's a lot of money having a baby and renting (theres a lot of hidden costs you dont even think about!)
good luck with whatever happens
Posted: Thu Aug 27, 2009 3:52 pm
in regards to your bf not being 18 yet you can still get a house together (me and oh were accepted last year and i was still 17)
hope everything goes well for you hun
and dont worry about age alot of younger lads are more mature then some of the older ones xxxx
<3 We became a couple September 27th 2007
Bubbles went to heaven September 25th 2008
Boo was born December 3rd 2009 (5 weeks early)
Zacky was born June 26th 2011
Pip was born October 17th 2012
Our HUGE surprise is due September 13th 2013 <3
Posted: Fri Feb 19, 2010 9:29 pm
i am 19 years old, and i am living with my oh parents he is 22 year old, we are looking for a place of our own, but aint having any look, neither of us have got a job, we both suffer with dislexia and no where will take us, so we sign on at job centre and get paid through them, but we aint giving up looking for work, but no place will take me now as i am pregnant, so we are going to stay with his parents for a bit, then going to have to look again and found some where to move to
Posted: Fri Feb 26, 2010 1:39 pm
Hi i was 15 wen i had my little girl now 2 years on i am coping well i have a supporting boyfriend ( the childs Father) that works full time and wen my baby was 6 weeks old i went bk 2 skwl and passed all my GCSE's and now currently doing my a levels then off to uni so i believe that u can do anything wen you put your mind to it and stay concentrated.