Posted: Fri Aug 21, 2009 10:06 pm
Post subject: Just found out no chance of natural conception...
Hi just joining you ladies from the 'fertility issues' section,
We had a Lap&Dye yesterday to find worst case, that both my tubes have been blocked by infection at some point. They have basically pretty much sealed themselves together. The surgeon told me it is unlikely to be as a result of the emergency ceasarian from our first child but I'm not so sure we fell easily for our first child and now its been two long years of trying which has concluded in this news. To boot he has told us that there is a small chance we could conceive naturally as a little dye got through one tube but every chance it will end up ectopic as the tubes are so blocked the egg is unlikely to make it to its proper place. This scares the poop out of me, do we have to go back to contraception as an extra twist of the knife or leave it to chance? We had a HSG in April which supposedly showed the right tube atleast was fine but now told both are badly damaged, how can this be? Did the HSG cause more harm than good? Guess that will be answered in our follow up.
I know this sounds selfish being we already have one child which i appreciate is more than some but I would so much love to have a second we dont want him to be an only child. The surgeon talked to us about IVF but when he found out we have one child together it all changed, apparently we would not be funded (but would be if he was not my husbands son!)
Its early days to be thinking about IVF we still feel numb from the news yesterday, only just been able to stop crying like a big baby, feel like I just heard my best friend has died but on the other hand I need to give myself some hope to cling to. I dont really know what I want to ask here just trying to gain some hope I guess from people who have been here too, how did you get through it? and is there any chance of fighting for the IVF to be funded?
Sorry to winge on but feel like I have just lost a special dream, my husband is not opening up to talk about it yet. Should I be grateful to have one fabulous son and leave it at that?
Any answers/advice from anyone who has been here will be a comfort please x
Posted: Sat Aug 22, 2009 6:14 pm
Hello, so sorry to hear your news, I know exactly how you feel. My DH has such a low sperm count that we have also been told we have to have IVF with ICSI.
It is completely devastating but somehow you come through it,cos you have to. If you'd told me a year ago I would be in this situation I would have thought I wouldnt cope and would be permanantly depressed. But Im not,Im getting on with my life and even tho it hurts sometimes, you just have to keep moving forward and looking forward to the next stage.
When we first found out we were told he didnt have any sperm and that they would have to do a biopsy to look for it, so there was a real possibility for a while that we might not ever have our own biological child. As it turns out, the count has improved slightly and IVF could work. After being so low and in the worst case scenario, everything else seems like good news, we were so happy to hear he had 2 million sperm even tho there was 100% abnormal forms, cos it meant we could have our own baby, most people would be devastated hearing that!
What Im trying to get round to saying is allow yourself time to grieve, feel low, feel hard done by and cheated and have a few days to let yourself think the worst. Then you'll pick yourself up and you'll see the positives and start to look forward to the next part of your journey.
Sorry if I've waffled on, good luck with everything.