Posted: Wed Jul 09, 2008 10:49 am
Post subject: 3 year old boy now wetting himself
Hi, I have a 3 year old boy who picked up potty training really quickly so you can imagine my dismay when after 6months of staying dry he's now started to wet himself without asking to go to the toilet. I think he holds on until its too late most of the time. Also he's constantly wetting the bed at night time, sometimes up to 3 times an evening.
Is this a passing phase? It seems that he's taking backward steps after picking it up so quickly.
I've cut down on his fluids around bedtime but to no avail.
Any help for a single dad would be most appreciated.
Posted: Fri Jul 11, 2008 8:02 pm
As a foster carer, childminder and teacher of many years!! But not a mum yet, Ihope my advice is ok!
If he has picked up potty training quickly, then he will proably get back into it quicklly. As you say it is like he is remembering to go too late. At his age he is probably becoming more engrossed in what he is doing and is forgetting to go as he is so involved in his games etc. My advice would be to go back to toilet training days where you remind him to go every hour or so, but reassure him no one will move his toy or that you can pause the video etc etc so he knows he isn't missing anything when he goes.
As for bedwetting, many many boys aren't trained at night until they are 7 or 8 so it is still early days (andI mean ordinary everday boys, not ones with probems or difficulties so don't feel labelled or anything!)
I'd say, if he is wetting so much at night, he still needs nappies at night. Wait again until they are dry every night before moving back to pants. Nappies, pull ups whatever at night (personally I'm anti pull ups in the day but at night if it helps him not to feel it is too much of a bacvkward step then go for it). It will relieve the pressure from both of you until he is ready.
Other hings to keep in mind- just in case : are there any changes in his life at the moment he may be worrying about which could be causing it (NOT SAYING THERE ARE! But if so you can try and sort as bes toyu can, and if not, then follow advice above and he is just being an ordinary little boy!!). Also - is it too dark or a long way to the toilet at night etc and anightlight in the hall/landing might help - again if so, easily fixed, if not then he just sin't ready!
Hope that helps
Posted: Sat Jul 12, 2008 10:23 am
Its so nice to see a dad on here!!! I agree with what has been said so far, most children around that age are so engrossed with what they are doing they forget. I was a nanny for years and had the chance to try lots of techniques (experiments on kids ), one of the ones that worked was anticipating a toilet stop, about half hour after a drink, taking them to the potty and heaps of praise when they pee'd. A sticker chart is great too. Small steps at that age, say 5 good potty's = a trip to the park or something simple that is special and slowly build up from their. 10 = finger painting and 20 = a day trip to the zoo. What ever you think would be fun and something to look forward too. I know its frustrating, just take it day by day and every good potty can get a clap and a kiss. Good luck!!!
Posted: Mon Jul 14, 2008 8:22 am
Many thanks for the replies, seems its looking like 'too busy for the toilet' scenario.
No major upsets in his routine, life etc, hall/landing light is left on every night, tried lifting and it does help (well reduces the amount of pee he wee's if you see what i mean)!
I'll carry on with his sticker awards and see how he gets on, i think pull-ups for bedtime may be worthwhile.
Thanks again, you've all helped a slightly worried dad.
Posted: Sun Jul 27, 2008 6:55 am
Post subject: Thanks guys
you've also helped out a concerned father of two...
my just-turned-three year old started off really great around 18 months, regressed, and did really well a second time round - to the point of always being dry and wanting to just have pjs at night.
he recently started wetting in the night again, then during the day too. it's very frustrating, and i often have to check my own frustration as i know him seeing it will only worsen the situation. problem is he's not above using it for attention if his 19 month old sister is getting it - i assume i'm just supposed to ignore this factor?
more recently, a couple of times in in the last couple of days, he's started to ask for a cuddle when he's dancing around desperate for a pee, and doesnt make it to the toilet even. i think this shows some sort of insecurity surrounding the toilet - perhaps we need to ease up on him even more, he's only three - but my partner is quite convinced (and irately) that he would pee on her while getting the cuddle, and is at a loss what to do/say. not sure if this is the case - he's certainly desperate and cant hold it long when he's asking for the cuddle.
by the looks of things, this forum especially, just keep on soldiering, bring incentives back in and hope for the best....
Posted: Sat Aug 02, 2008 2:25 pm
Post subject: potty
im having the same problems but with my 4 year old he was doing great but now he has just gone back to wetting himself he has never pooed in the potty or toilet just his pants i try not to get angry but hes starting school in 6 weeks and im scared he might get bullied because of this