Posted: Wed Jul 23, 2008 10:16 am
Post subject: Does it get easier
Does it get easier after a mc. I had a mc at 18 weeks that was on the 11 july we had a little boy and we called him Billy, some days i feel ok but other days i jut wont to stay in bed and cry but have to be strong for my other children. my family have been great but now i feel like i have to hide how im feeling so i dont uspet them.
It just feels like life and my body has gone back to normal and it doesnt feel fair when im feeling so rubbish.
Sorry for the long rambeling post.
Posted: Wed Jul 23, 2008 10:36 am
Have not been in this situation, but I can imagine that time will help you heal. My heart goes out to you and your family. I am sure your partner is also still grieving as it is still relatively new, just make sure you communicate with one another.
Posted: Thu Jul 24, 2008 12:53 pm
I remember only too well those weeks and months that followed the loss of our baby. The shock that is still with you is so difficult to reconcile to life just carrying on. There is nothing I can say honey, except that yes it does get better with time, but you will need time - which is something that you haven't had yet. Your time will come when you feel as though you can live your life again - but we will never forget. You picked a beautiful name for your beautiful baby boy sweetie, and Im sure he knows how much you love him. All my love to you and your family Pipsx
Posted: Fri Jul 25, 2008 12:15 pm
i too lost a baby at 18 weeks, i had a little girl and i called her Jamie. i'd like to reassure you that it does get easier with time, its a horrible thing to have to go through and i know exactly how you feel... how your feeling is totally normal, i cried and cried for weeks after i lost my little girl. dont hied your feelings, people will understand that you are upset and with damn good reason!
the things that helped me get through it were robably that we had a little card with 3 pictures and her feet and hand prints on it, do you have anything like this so that you can remember your little man by? also the funeral helped (its not a legal formality to have you baby berried when its classed as a miscarriage but to me it helped greatly being able to say a proper goodbye to our little girl) also gives me somewhere to go and talk to her when i really miss her... made a little garden around the grave stone for her on her birthday too. perhaps if none of this is possible you could plant a flower or soemthing to always remind you of your little boy.
did they say why you lost him? my little girls death was due to turners syndrome.
please dont try and go through the rest of this grief alone as i know all too well how hard that is! even when other people seem to have moved on they can still be there for you! please dont feel guilty about upsetting other people, its a horrible thing you have experienced!
im here if you need to talk!
Posted: Thu Jul 31, 2008 9:45 am
thanks for all your replys this has helped me, to deal with this loss. they havnt told me why i lost billy but i need to go back to hospital in 6 weeks for results from tests on my placenta although all my blood tests were fine.
we will be having a funeral for billy in argust we are doing it through the hospital they have been really great with everything.
we have put together a box with the pictures we have of billy and ive put his cards in that we got, i will in time write him a letter but at the moment its to difficult.
like i said thanks for all the support its really great to know that people understand what im feeling.
Sorry to read about your loss also will be thinking about you all.
Dawn X X
Posted: Tue Sep 09, 2008 12:06 pm
Dawn i know its hard and you never forget. But eventually the raw primal pain is replaced with a little ache that will always be there but it gets bareable. Talk or write a letter to your partner. He is grieving to and you need eachother now more than ever. I had eight miscarrages and a still born baby In ten years. And now i have a baby girl and i never thought it was real till she arrived but it is. Please post something if you need to talk.