Posted: Tue Oct 12, 2010 10:19 pm
Post subject: Advice Please-Quite Long
Really not happy
My little girl who was 4 last week is usually so well behaved, can take her anywhere, she gets on with other children, no problems at preschool, lots of friends, happy and content....
I went to a soft play centre yesturday with her, a place we go regularly everyweek. She was off playing with her buddies, i've never had problems with her behaviour so i don't watch her like a hawk as she is too fast to keep up with anyway! but the mums i go with take it in turns to just go and check the kids every minute or so. Anyway, 2 other mothers came up to me, and said "excuse me your little girl just kicked my baby, and it made me feel sick!" i was like, "MY little girl did WHAT???" So anyway, i apologised, and my daughter came up to me, and i asked her if she did do it, and she said she didnt.... I said tell mummy the truth, and she got really upset.angry that i kept asking her, was burying her head in my lap crying, and say that she didnt do it.... so in the end, as i hadn't seen it, and she said she didn't do it, i gave her a stern warning and let her carrying on playing. She was fine for the next 20 mins and then wanted to go home, so we left. In my car on the way home i said, "i'm going to ask you one more time, did you kick the baby?" and she said "Yes, he was in my way!!!".....so i was furious with her, lectured her on lying, and how its mean and you shouldnt do that kind of thing etc (seeing as she is expecting a little brother within 5 weeks!) she kept saying "sorry" but i just didnt think the message was getting through....When we got home there was no telly and treats etc and bed early.
ANYWAY today, another friend asked me today to go to a different funfarm. I told her what had happened yesturday, she told me not to worry about it, as she knows my daughter very well as said it was very out of character for her....so i agreed to go to the Funfarm.
We were there about 20 mins, and i was keeping a watchful eye on my LO and her friend, who have both just turned 4, and then i saw them both jumping on a toddler who was crying!!!!! i was mortified, we both rushed in and got the little boy out of the way and took him to his mum, and our 2 had run off and hid having being caught red handed! We got them out, and took them home striaght away crying and screaming as they wanted to stay and play....my LO wouldnt put her shoes on, so carried her out in her socks etc to make sure she got the message that what she had done was unacceptable.....Again, no telly when we got home, no treats and early night....
Told my OH both times, but he works so late she has been asleep both nights whe he has got in so he hasnt been able to have a word with her....but i was cross with her all day...im terrified its the start of something awful. Ive told me, explained to her over and over that it is not kind, its bad, how would she feel if someone did it to her, etc etc etc i just feel soooooooooo bad as its so out of character, she is usually so mothering to lchildren younger than her, and if anything pee's them off helping them too much!) i dont understand where its coming from....the only thing i can think is as if she is showing off in front of her friends or something.....ANY advice would b great, im scared to go to a play area now incase she hurts someone, feel so bad !
Posted: Wed Oct 13, 2010 5:40 pm
hiya,i dont know if i can offer any helpful advice, but i didnt wana read n run!
i know how embarrassing it can be when your LO does this kind of thing, especially when it is so out of character, it catches you off guard.
but i wouldnt worry too much, if this isnt her usual behaviour, it may just be showing off in front of her friends, or it could be some pent up frustartion and uncertainty about the new baby thats about to arrive, you know, just a lil anxious??
i wouldnt stop taking her to the soft play areas, maybe just talk to her before you go in, like explain what will happen if she hurts other children and carry on with what you are doing, with taking her away when she does behave unacceptably, im sure other parents understand that children play up sometimes (as embarrassing as it is! lol)
sorry that was so useless coz its what you already know lol but just didnt wana R&R lol xXx
Posted: Wed Oct 13, 2010 6:55 pm
Thanks for replying!!! thats why it upset me so much as she is usually so motherly, it was a total shock to see her doing it!!!! didn't think about the new baby being an issue really....but it probably is. Hopefully it doesnt happen again, couldnt bare her being a meany to other kids x