am i a bad step mum?

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georgia20
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Posted: Thu Jun 24, 2010 7:13 pm 
Post subject: am i a bad step mum?
hey people ive been with my fella for 3 and half years he has a 5 year old little boy who i do love to bits, we get him from school every friday and take him back sunday evenin so he dont really spend any time at his mums witch suits her fine! This aint really the problem the problem is my due date is on a friday and ive said to my oh i would prefer his son not to be here on my due date as if i go into labour i dont want to panic him plus the little boys mum dont drive so wouldnt be able to get him. I dont mind still gettin him but just not overnight is this selfish? I feel bad but dont no how to get round it cos could be 2 weeks later than my due date any one got any advise? Sad xxxx
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libertytmk
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Posted: Thu Jun 24, 2010 7:19 pm 
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I don't think that's unreasonable at all. If he is with you then you're going to have to arrange childcare for himm. It just sounds like you're being sensible
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Urgh82
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Posted: Thu Jun 24, 2010 7:23 pm 
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surely on and around ur due date u are able to give it a miss just that time?? a baby wont arrive when its convenient for every one unfortunately Sad
georgia20
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Posted: Thu Jun 24, 2010 7:43 pm 
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thanks girls i just feel guilty. The kids mother will make are life really hard and be like you leavin him out and everything but when she had her other kids we had him for 2 weeks but was easier for her cos she had an elective c section so we new when we had to have him! I no this is guna turn to a massive issue! Xx
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seonaidandrea
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Posted: Thu Jun 24, 2010 8:30 pm 
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My oh and I are in a similar situation my due date is a sat and we have the girls Friday to Sunday every weekend. they are a bit older 10 and 7 but am dreading going into labour while they are here, its my first and I'm really worried about me going into a panic never mind them!!
We are pretty lucky that oh mum is only round the corner so she will have them but pretty sure that the ex will make a fuss about having to pick girls up or drop them off,(she can drive but has never collected or dropped them off in about 2 years)
I do think that your just trying to be sensible and anyway you'll be excepitionally pregnant i think we both have a right to be selfish!!! Laughing xx
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georgia20
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Posted: Thu Jun 24, 2010 8:44 pm 
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your oh ex sounds like mine lol! I no she will have something to say she lives about 30 min away and dont drive, she will say were leavin him out but im sorry its my first aswell and im only 20 the last thing i want to be thinkin about when im in labour is how to get someone to look after the little one! Why do ex have to be so hard work its strange cos if me and my oh split up i wouldnt want him to have our son every weekend i would miss him to much xx
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ClairaBell
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Posted: Fri Jun 25, 2010 8:18 am 
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You are definatly not a bad stepmom.

If I am lucky enough to ever be in your position I would be the same - though mine are a bit older. And their mom would probably have something to say too. Rolling Eyes xxx
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georgia20
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Posted: Fri Jun 25, 2010 10:14 am 
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thanks hun, i love him to bits but dont want to feel guilty i wonder if i broke up with my oh i would try and make his life harder in the future (proberly) lol Smile ps i hope it happens for you xxx
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Corrie22
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Posted: Mon Jul 05, 2010 8:23 am 
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No you aren't in the wrong. Not sure what to suggest but I think perhaps leave it to the last minute to tell his Mum and try to avoid a long drawn out argument over things! I wouldn't enter into any discussion about it and just say something like well obviously we won't be able to have him over night etc and just say what you said about not wanting to scare him or disrupt him at night and so on. Focus on it being for his own good, which it is! And also if you are in hosp over the w/e your oh could bring him into see the baby therefore not leaving him out.
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