Emotionally distressed, having horrible thoughts...

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bstarr
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Posted: Tue Jan 01, 2008 8:10 am 
Post subject: Emotionally distressed, having horrible thoughts...
I am almost 6 months pregnant with my little girl, Lizzy.
I feel awful as it is, not knowing the exact time of conception.
I am also very young, and unwed.
Since I've been pregnant, her father has been completely stressed out, and doesn't know if he still wants to be with me but however wants to take care of the baby.

Every day something happens that makes me wish I wasn't alive anymore. I know I could never actually go through with it, because I love my child. But I can't feel any love for myself. I only know that I love her and her father, and would die for them both.

I am never happy. I am always lethargic and depressed. I have talked about wanting to give her up for adoption because I know I won't be a good mother. I am so emotionally unssatisfied that I can't imagine giving her any of the care or love that she deserves.

I just don't know what to do.
I don't have anyone to talk to.
mrswolfbane
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Posted: Tue Jan 01, 2008 3:24 pm 
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talk to your midwife she can help more than u may think huny
dollychops2
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Posted: Wed Jan 02, 2008 12:52 pm 
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I agree, talk to your midwife. Have you got any family as well who you could talk to, mum, dad, sister? hope your ok xx
JumpingJo100
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Posted: Sat Jan 05, 2008 9:49 am 
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Hiya i can understnad what you seem to be going through as i suffer with depression myself.... As everyone else has said, it would most probably be a great help if you spoke to your midwife about your feelings, at least you would feel you have the support you need!
As for you are very young, im 17 and im 6 weeks pregnant, just because we are young doesnt mean we have any less of a right to be mothers!
Since i found out i was pregnant its given me a reason and a perpose to be alive.
As for your boyfriend he really doesnt seem like he is treating you very well, at a time like this, this is when you need support from him! Wheather or not he wants to be with you in a relationship, he should still be there for you as at the end of the day its his baby you are carring!
If you do believe its best for the baby to be put up for adoption, it should be your decision and its not a decision that has to be made over night!!
Just give yourself sometime and space, and look on these forums for support..
Hope your ok, and let me know how things go
Joanna xxx
mylillamb
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Posted: Sat Jan 05, 2008 3:16 pm 
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hiya i no how your feeling i feel the same. its like everyday something else happens to get you down i feel like my head is just above the water. but one thing i do no is that im ganna be the best mum ever im going to love my baby so much. my babys dad is in prison now, n i feel so alone i have a low paid job and have no money saved up. but when i feel really down i just think off my baby inside me growing and it makes me feel stronger and better. when i see my midwife im going to explain how iv been feeling and see what advice and help there is. just keep your head up and think off how luckly you are to have made such a beautuiful baby. hope u feel better soon xx
mrswolfbane
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Posted: Sat Jan 05, 2008 3:18 pm 
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by the way u can also take certain anti-depressants in pregnancy to help u with the moods depression brings i know his bcuz i have depression and i was told that after 12 weeks i wud be able to go back on to medication safely so speak to the midwife and gp.

also get help from groups such as homestart and sure start and theres lot of groups for women under 19 that can help with parenting skills and other things so search for courses in your area.

i did one called young mums to be and it was really good fun taught me about my new baby before he came and taught me skills like budgettin and fianance so it was useful as well.
mrswolfbane
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Posted: Sat Jan 05, 2008 3:19 pm 
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mylillamb ask about benefits as u will get help if ur in a low paid job
Charlplusbabies
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Posted: Mon Jan 14, 2008 4:10 pm 
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mrswolfbane wrote:
by the way u can also take certain anti-depressants in pregnancy to help u with the moods depression brings i know his bcuz i have depression and i was told that after 12 weeks i wud be able to go back on to medication safely so speak to the midwife and gp.


Shocked

ok, yes there are some medications and anti-depressants that we can prescribe to pregnant women in extreme cirumstanes. like in your case mrswolfbane and im sure you wouldnt have taken them if you didnt need them as your g.p wouldnt prescribed if you dint need them.
but anti-depressants arent something we take lightly. anti-depressants are highly addictive and can effect baby and so you need to be VERY careful with them. there are alternative methods which will be discussed with you by your g.p and midwife. we woldnt just automatically hand ou anti-d's.
sometimes just talking things over and having options and information put to you is a massive help for some. anti-depressants are not always the answer.

hope you have been to seek professional help bstarr xx[/i]
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